Life — May 24, 1923 — page 36: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

The Shock Absorber used exclusively on a majority of the world’s finest motor cars. There is no car so finely made or beautifully balanced that it does not need the cushioning comfort of Hoo-Dye Hydraulic control, Hoo-Dye and riding comfort are inseparable for one cannot be obtained without the other. THE HOUDAILLE COMPANY 1418 West Avenue Buffalo, N. Y. Houde Eng. Corp. Mfrs. Burying the Hatchet In an attempt to settle the war of rivalry that has so long existed be- tween the cities of Minneapolis and St. Paul, it was decided by. the civic or- ganizations of the two cities to have a banquet and get-together meeting to see if ways and means could not be found to bury all animosities. After partaking of good food and pre-Volstead refreshments, speeches were in order. The chairman called on a prominent citizen of Minneapolis, who in a very forcible manner eulogiz- ed the twin cities, their resources, their advantages, and the pleasure of living in the united city. When he had finished, a gentleman from St. Paul arose and stated that there was just one question he wanted to ask:. “What shall we name the united city?” The gentleman from Minneapolis arose and, after considerable thinking, said: “I would name it Minnehaha— ‘Minne’ for Minneapolis and ‘Ha! Ha!’ for St. Paul.”—Forbes. The Addict Among Jimmie Maiden’s favorite stories is the one concerning the two men who were getting acquainted through the medium of casual conver- sation. “Do you play golf?” inquired one of them. “No,” s id the other; “but I can't give it up.”"—New York Herald. Simplification The following is an example of the simplicities of “pidgin” English, as set forth in a bill rendered by a Jap driver in Hilo, Hawaii: “10 comes and 10 goes at 50c a went, $5."—Washington Star. A Britis visitor says that the New Yorkers go about “frowning with competitive meditations.” Rather neat, that !—Boston Transcript. A Waste of Breath Panex Doctor (to gloomy patient) : You must drive away this depression. Practise a spirit of cheerfulness. Sing at your work, as it were. Patient: Sing at my work? Why, it can't be done, sir. I'm a glass blower. —Punch. Anp who was the deceased motor- ist that held the Non-Stop, Look and Listen record?—Brooklyn Eagle, Sure Relief FOR INDIGESTION |t V5 gp | Hot water oe OS => > Sure Relief SELL-ANS 25¢ ano 75¢ PACKAGES EVERYWHERE OU R_ OLISH CONTEMFO a eas Marking Time A Negro called upon an old friend, who received him in a rocking chair and continued to rock himself to and fro i in a most curious way. “Yo’ ain't. sick, Harrison?” asked the caller, ‘anxiously, “No, I ain’t sick, Mose,” said Har- rison. There was a moment's silence, dur- ing which the caller gazed wide-eyed at the rocking figure. “Den,” continued Mose, “why does yo’ rock yo’self dat way all de time?” Harrison explained : “Yo’ know Bill Blott? Well, he sold me a silver watch cheap, an’ if I stops moving like dis, dat watch don’t gol”—Tit-Bits. Right at Headquarters “That saloon next to the police sta- tion is doing the biggest business in town.” “It ought to—it has the best pro- tection.”—Wesleyan Wasp. wv seat orf Time to Re-tire? FISK comicbooks.com