Life, 1923-02-22 · page 15 of 36
Life — February 22, 1923 — page 15: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
**"It All Depends" Poem:** This is a satirical poem about George Washington, playing on the famous (and likely apocryphal) cherry tree legend. The joke inverts the moral lesson: while Washington's father mildly scolded him for chopping down the tree, the poem asks what would happen if young George had *smashed* the expensive maraschino cherries instead—suggesting the punishment would have been far worse for destroying valuable goods than for destroying nature. **"Traffic Cops" Cartoon:** The lower illustration appears to show figures using poles or implements near water, with a caption making a crude joke about someone "going off into Heaven in his fiery chariot" and asking if you "got his number"—likely a dark humor reference to a traffic accident or death. The page primarily contains political/social satire typical of Life magazine's early 20th-century commentary.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
LIFE - 13 It All Depends AW \\ \ EORGE WASHINGTON—so one instructs a child, Pig SW Pointing a moral in a manner gracious,— , 2 Brink Chopped down a cherry tree and rendered wild Z iis father by his hatchet work audacious. But George escaped—his scolding was but mild. \Yould he to-day—no matter how veracious— If se had smashed the maraschino cherries The! cost his papa thirty-seven “berries”? Tho Father of his Country—so ’tis set wn in our schoolbooks and in volumes musty— Once had the hardihood to make a bet, all his pride of manhood, young and lusty, That ‘cross the broad Potomac’s reaches wet lied fling a dollar with his right arm trusty. But though he did it then, I ask with reason Ho far he’d make a dollar go this season. | Our first of Presidents—'tis writ of him— \o matter if the step he took were risky, | Wold act with great decision, vigor, vim, | in that old rebellion over whisky. The folk who thought that tax stamps were a whim \Vere shown the Union stood for nothing frisky. Bu: while George squelched the illicit still-and-keggers, Wire would he get to-day with our bootleggers? I irewell Message—often learned by heart— told us not with lands abroad to tangle. Keep clear, lay off, cut loose and nothing start, {le counselled us, or we'd be in a wrangle. He urged a minding-our-own-business part; let wave at home our flag of stars that spangle. | Al. O. K. then, but now his words sound funny, Since foreign nations owe us so much money. Traffic Cops (as Elijah goes off into Heaven in his fiery chariot): Did you get his number? F. D. Fables for Farmers E DGELEY, Nortu Dakota, January 16TH. Peter superintendent, and janitor. The balance will be used for Neilson, the well-known wheat grower in Township the installation of a new incubator and an electric goat- 2, declared a stock dividend to-day of one mortgage, three shearing machine. Red Duroc hogs, and seven young Neilsons of assorted sizcs. representing the results of thirty-two years’ work on is farm. It is supposed that this action was taken ent to avoid the Federal tax on surplus profits. Bepetia, Iowa, Fesruary 5tH. Mr. Adolph Dumm- kopf, the dairy farmer who invented the automatic milking attachment operated during the fly season by tail power, has completed arrangements for financing the !\YETTEVILLE, ARKANSAS, JANUARY 8TH. Jonas K. stock growers of his county by a system of bank loans im- Bo ly has incorporated his apple orchard, and up to 60 per cent. of the value of all mail-order cata- ind issd underlying gold bonds to the amount of $150.00, logues. In event that the loans are not paid Mr. Dumm- sec'red by two mules, one hand-sprayer, nine hound kopf’s scheme provides that the catalogues may be util- do: :. and Mrs. Boody. These bonds are exempt from ized for fuel purposes, thus solving the coal problem. all ‘axes other than those levied by municipal, county, MoresviLLe, ALABAMA, Fepruary 2npD. Mr. Jasmine staic and Federal authorities. Mr. Boody agrees that the A. Peevy, owner of a watermelon patch in this vicinity, suriax on incomes is driving capital out of industry. was agreeably surprised to-day on receipt of statement GosHen, New Yorx, January 27tH. The John S. of his account for a carload of melons, shipped last Philips Amalgamated duck and angora goat ranch has August to Chicago, to learn that he owed only $21.75 ma‘e application for authority to increase its capital for balance on freight, icing, storage and commissions, stoc': of $1,414.00. Of the money received from the sale over what the melons sold for. Mr. Peevy has wired of ‘he new stock $1,150.00 will be devoted to paying Mr. Frank A. Munsey, New York: “Agree with you arr: ars of the salaries due the president, general manager, conservative party needed. Collect.” -on- comicbooks.com