Life — November 9, 1922 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Things LIFE Would Rather Like to Know HETHER Senator Felton, while in Congress, will at- tend to her knitting. x ok OK Whether Attorney-General Daugh- erty’s ruling applies to the May- flower. * * * What size gloves Senator Calder wears. x ok OK Why theatre tickets cost almost as much as a Ford car. * * * Whether Secretary Hughes knows the rules of Beaver. + + How many delegates to the Demo- cratic National Convention William R. Hearst will have if Al Smith is elected Governor of New York. * ok OK Whether Doctor Cook is to join Caillaux or Clare Sheridan as for- eign correspondent of the New York World. * oe Ok Why a good ten-cent cigar costs fifty. * * * The person reported to have en- gaged passage on an American liner. Why you can pad it and wrap it as much as you will but the shape of a gin bottle clings to it still. * # * Whether it would help opposing teams if they could get the numbers of the Harvard football players. * ok Ok How it feels to have a fifty-million dollar piece of melon drop in your mouth. * * * Whether Great Britain isn’t rather fortunate in having a cabinet that can and will resign. * * * Whether Will Rogers couldn't set- tle our international complications if he had rope enough. i ee Whether Brigadier-General Saw- yer intends to exchange the star for the shingle. * * * If the 49’ers are playing 50-50. ee * What is the Christian name of our present regular army. x * * If the next European war-dance will be a combination of the goose step and the Turkey-Trotsky. Hurry! (The Life Story of an American Citizen) “(7 AA—WAA—W-A-A-A-H_ | (Meaning, “Hurry with my bottle.” “Huwwy, Mama. I dot a pain.” “Cantcher see I’m in a hurry? I'll be late for school if I come back and brush my hair.” 3210 “Gosh, she said she’d be ready at eight! Why can’t girls hurry?” “Hurry, Janet, before they get started with the rice.” “Hurry up with breakfast, can't you? I’ve been sitting here two minutes without a thing to eat.” “Hurry, doctor !” “If we're going to get back before baby wakes up, we'll have to hurry.” “Waiter, bring me a glassofmilk andapieceofapplepie. And step live- ly. I'm in a hurry.” “Willie, when papa calls you he wants you to hurry. Do you under- stand?” “Hello—yes—this you, Janet?— Yes—well, talk fast—I’m hurrying to keep an appointment.” “T'd like to know what the service in this club is coming to. You heard me tell ’em we were in a hurry.” “Tam NOT racing. I’m hurr ing to get ahead of that truck, t all I’m doing.” “Three minutes to get the boat. We can make it, if we hurry.” “Hurry up and deal, can’t yo “No use talking, I can’t hurry like I once could,” “Yep, need a rest. Doctor says I got to get away in a hurry, so I'll humor him.” “Hurry, and we'll go through this damn foursome.” “I DON’T eat too fast, I tell you!” “Is the doctor coming? Did you tell him it was a hurry call?” “Hurry with that prescription, can’t you?” “I hereby bequeath to my several nephews and nieces the sum of —— Can’t you take dictation any faster than that?” “Hurry up with that oxygen tank!” Found among the personal papers of the deceased: “To my executors. Don’t let anything pass us on the way to the cemetery.” Any young man is made better by a sister’s love. It isn’t always necessary, though, that it should be his own sister. comicbooks.com