Life, 1922-04-20 · page 13 of 34
Life — April 20, 1922 — page 13: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
The top illustration depicts a rural spring scene with farmers and a horse, accompanying a humorous exchange about life ambitions. One character states he'd be a farmer if forced to live over; when asked what he'd be otherwise, he replies "A Rooshian bally-dancer"—satirizing the exotic appeal of Russian performers to American audiences. Below, "The Ten Commandments of the New Police Patrol" presents mock rules for police conduct, likely critiquing early 20th-century police reform efforts in New York City. The satirical "commandments" address patrol duties, schedule adherence, and preventing corruption—suggesting actual police practices fell short of these ideals. The final item, "In the Near Future," appears to be humorous domestic satire about children's errands.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
“Jes’ the same, if I hed my life to live ‘over I wouldn’t be no farmer.” “What would you be?” “A Rooshian bally-dancer.” The Ten Commandments of the New Police Patrol ] EIGHTY Fords shall be used for e patrol purposes. A different make may be substituted later if it can be shown that the latter are noisier and give the gunmen more of a sporting chance. 2. Officers driving flivvers shall stick to their assigned beats and not congest trafic by pursuing criminals out of their own precincts. 3. In view of the above, escaping criminals are expected to remain in the precinct in which they are at work and to leave under no circumistances with- out passports approved by the Police Department. 4. Patrol flivvers shall observe the routes and schedules prescribed for them by the Police Commissioner. Of- ficers making arrests as a result of fail- ure to observe this schedule will be liable to charges preferred against them by gunmen in good standing. Such arrests shall be held to constitute prima facie evidence of dereliction of duty. 5. Officers in flivvers shall sound horn continuously when proceeding on rounds, in order that “the biggest and cleanest city in the world” may know that it is being protected. 6. Burglars, gunmen and others de- siring copies of these schedules shall be furnished them on request. The Po- lice Department has no secrets from anyone except that tool of the capital- istic interests, the subsidized press. 7. Patrol flivvers shall assemble promptly at six in the evening before proceeding on rounds, to greet the best Five-Cent Mayor the City Ever Had with appropriate flourishes and ruffles. The Mayor will permit no motors to idle on such occasions. 8. Any officers observing suspicious circumstances shall report same at con- clusion of rounds to Commissioner In- wrong, who will assign each its place on the calendar and investigate same as soon as feasible. 9. Under the head of “suspicious cir- cumstances” shall be included: Man holding up both hands as he examines pistol held by another. Men (of any description) opening safes with acetylene torches, Women smoking. 10. Remember that the practice of holding up the Common People of this city must be stopped. That's our privi- lege. Tracy Hammond Lewis. In the Near Future OTHER: Children, here’s a quar- ter. Go down to the saloon and get your ice-cream cone and soda water. And on your way back, stop in the drug store and bring your father home. comicbooks.com