Life, 1922-03-02 · page 5 of 34
Life — March 2, 1922 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This satirical poem by Berton Braley celebrates Will H. Hays, likely Hollywood's leading figure (appears to be Will Hays, film industry executive). The text praises him for tackling the movie industry's problems—stupidity, vulgarity, greed, wastefulness, and vanity among filmmakers and actors. The cartoon depicts a movie set with numerous people gathered, seemingly representing the various problematic personalities Hays must manage. The caption's joke about "formin' a syndicate an' gettin' one" suggests industry workers organizing, possibly referencing labor disputes or union formation concerns of the era. The overall message: Hays faces an enormous task reforming Hollywood's moral standards and professional conduct. The satire celebrates his efforts while humorously acknowledging how difficult the challenge truly is.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
HAY, THERE! Berton Braley 6 Naa vigorous activities and business-like proclivities Thus starts a movie serial with Hays for its material, With which his every fibre is athrob, A gripping tale in many rapid reels, His infinite capacity for vim and for vivacity, In which our hero airily goes forth to battle merrily, Have landed him this super-movie job; “Fearless of Aught that Destiny Reveals!” For movie magnates various whose woes grew multifarious, Directors stern will bow to him and all the starskowtowto him, Who stood amid their troubles in a daze, (Assuming he can make them change their ways), Bewailed their lot exceedingly and bellowed very pleadingly, While we who form his gallery will watch him earnhissalary “For Gawd’s sake come and save us, Mr. Hays!” And sing out “Attaboy!” to Mr. Hays! It’s only fair to shout to him for there’s a job cut out for him Which is a very thorny task indeed; He'll wrestle with stupidity and cerebral solidity And battle with vulgarity and greed, With wastefulness and vanity and dullness and inanity; For here’s the movie problem in a phrase, Our interest now wanes in them because of lack of brainsinthem— How is your cerebellum, Mr. Hays? “What’s the matter with formin’ a syndicate an’ gettin’ one?” comicbooks.com