Life, 1920-10-14 · page 9 of 44
Life — October 14, 1920 — page 9: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page satirizes golf's popularity among wealthy Americans. The essay argues golf appeals to middle-aged men seeking inexpensive entertainment, contrasting it with fishing. It humorously claims golf inspired a "school of infancy, second only to the language of the sea" and references religious figures (Saint Peter, Saint Anthony, Saint Andrew, Saint Patrick) allegedly playing golf or blessed by it—obvious fabrications mocking the sport's cultural elevation. The cartoon below depicts Methuselah (the biblical figure who lived 969 years) as a professional golfer, unable to change his habits despite centuries of existence. The joke: even extreme longevity won't break golf addiction, satirizing how obsessively devoted golfers are to the sport. The satire targets golf's grip on American society and players' inability to quit.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Golf the Glorious [ is easy to say why golf, like fishing, holds its votaries in bondage. Like fishing, it is pre-eminently fitted for man's declining years, when he knows the value of enthusiasm, Youth trifles superciliously with a round of sports; but middle age has studied life's limitations. When it finds a pleasure which is not expensive, unwholesome or immoral, it recognizes the finality of the favor. Therefore it is that venerable philanthropists wear sport clothes, and pace the links, spied upon by ecsta reporters. Therefore do we read newspaper articles entitled, “Golfer at Eighty-five Defies Dr. Osler.” Therefore does the popularity of the game exceed all reckoning. Its only successor is solitaire. Golf has inspired a school of fiction, a school of verse, a school of profanity, second only to the language of the sea, and wholly unfit for the lips of immaturity. It has its collec- Methuselah (to club professional) : tion of thrice-told tales, and an array of legends, showing that heaven and hell are equally interested in the sport The devil has been known to play a round on Scottish links, using the handle of his cotton umbrella for a club. An expert golfer challenged him, and won the souls of four dead com- rades—damned for swearing—from his clutches. nt Peter blessed a friendly mechanic who mended his driver when he was on the point of being beaten by Saint Anthony, and the man lived a hundred years, playing stupendously to the end int Andrew and Saint Patrick were mighty and well-matched champions, upholding the fame of their respective lands. It is pleasant to record that it was a point of honor with them to bar all miraculous strokes. The contest being one of skill, not saintliness, they took for their motto: “No miracles among friends.” Agnes Repplier LOOK HERE! I'VE BEEN TEEING UP MY BALL THIS WAY FOR NINE HUNDRED AND SEVENTY-EIGHT YEARS, AND YOU CAN'T GET ME TO CHANGE NOW comicbooks.com