Life, 1920-06-24 · page 14 of 41
Life — June 24, 1920 — page 14: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains a satirical poem titled "Nailing a Calumny" and a cartoon titled "First Banquet in Old Plymouth." The poem defends Puritan settlers against accusations of burning witches, arguing they were actually austere but not literally witch-burners. It criticizes them for other faults—intolerance, hypocrisy, and killing Native Americans—while insisting "they never burned their witches." The cartoon depicts the "First Banquet in Old Plymouth" with the caption "Come on, boys, dinner's ready." It shows Pilgrims and Native Americans in a chaotic scene that appears to satirize the mythologized "first Thanksgiving," suggesting the relationship was far more complicated and violent than popular history suggests. The accompanying text "Puritan New England" continues this theme, noting that Massachusetts has recently legalized Sunday sports and beer—progress that contrasts sharply with strict Puritan values.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
FIRST BANQUET IN OLD PLYMOUTH “COME ON, BOYS, DINNER’S READY” Nailing a Calumny UR worthy Puritans, I gather From reading tough old Cor Mather And sifting legend, fact and rumor, Were wholly destitute of humor A chosen race of pious Grundys They duly thanked their God on When providential chills-and-fey Erased the Redskin unbelievers Remorseless Greek and Hebrew scholars They wore uncompromising collars And gloomy headgear, cloaks and breeches: But, please!—they did not burn their witches! As long as Time his pathway trud, We'll hold against them sundry g Those joyless, tyrannous fana' Who stored grim furniture in They frowned on sport (though every Was free to take his daily toddy) Dissenters all to them were fakers; They prisoned, flogged and Quakers; Yet, while it pleased their s That amateurs of necromancy Should be high-hanged in hempen hitches, At least they never burned their witches. They had their faults, those brave old fellows Whose iron aspect distance mellows; They had no tolerance whatever For things we justify as “ They held, like some alive at present, That nothing could be Right Pleas- ant, Yet killed off all their homely ladies As patently in league with Hades ‘clever; Their creed and politics were tribal; But let us brand the ancient libel As false as extra curls and switches— They never, never burned their witches! arthur Guiterman. “Puntan New England” HAT has long been the favorite phra in referring to the section wh most everything is supposed to he pressed. And yet— Massachusetts has legalized Su sports, and her Senate and Ho’ passed favorably on 2.73 beer and light wines. The Boston police commissioner: a test case in court, has been com to withdraw the police he detai supervise dancing in hotels, The Bay State will probably soon ! ize prize fighting. (Even the Watch Ward Society has been won over to it.) It can’t he that the heart of New Eng- land is beginning to react! And yet— comicbooks.com