Life, 1920-02-26 · page 17 of 40
Life — February 26, 1920 — page 17: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several satirical pieces reflecting early 20th-century concerns: **"Quick Delivery"** depicts a scientist communicating with Mars via some futuristic device. The joke satirizes utopian visions of space colonization by having Mars inhabitants describe an absurdly perfect society: they automatically eliminate "bores, diplomats and literary freaks," provide free drinks, charge only 5 cents for cigars, destroy "homely" women, and impose no taxes. The satire mocks both fantastical space fiction and idealistic social engineering schemes. **The cartoon "Defined"** uses a brief exchange to satirize celebrity and media: a "genius" is redefined as simply "a man with a clever press agent"—poking fun at how publicity shapes public perception of talent. The remaining pieces—poems and letters—are lighter humor about everyday domestic life and romantic awkwardness, typical of Life's mixed content format blending social commentary with general amusement.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
DEFINED “SAY, STORMIF, WILAT'S A GENIUS, ANYWAY?" “GENERALLY, HE'S A MAN WITH A CLEVER PRESS AGENT.” Treasures Te blessings that Fate hands to us Are oft divided right; Por 1 have sugar in my bin, My friend has anthracite. My friend has hens that really la Gut "twould be hard to choose— + T have feet well planned to wear The barguin-table shoes! Ethel M. Coleman, has five thou- But: father, Billy sand a year.” “ My dear girl, your clothes cost that.” “But we'll buy the clothes.” A Letter To Jo Sillers, Caleb's Corners, Maine. D RE JO its no fun bein sik in this plas I got here alrit Noo Yok is sum town I sed it Jo, but tha ar so blamed bissy I never see em enywa its up in the air miles T got the flu nd I ken luk down on Centre! Pak Gee its awful to be sik tha dont care I hope T di before sundown tha got me in a bed al alon an I ant seen a livin sol for 4 das Yours truly Jin Quick Delivery HE crucial moment had arrived at last. The great scientist—making the final adjustment and reassured by a timely click—held the instrument to his ears. “Is this you, Mars?” “Yes,” came the faint answer, trans- lated by code. “How many people have you got up there?” “Oh, we're limited to a couple of hundred millions. We automatically get rid of bores, diplomats and literary freaks as soon as they hecome known.” “ Anything to drink?” “My! yes. We keep it in’ public fountains, free for all.” “Smoke “Most expensive cigar is five cents.” “ How are the girls? “All homely ones immediately de- stroyed.” “ Any income taxes?” We—" scientist ang a “No taxes a The grea When his assistant came hell, in he said quietly : “Harold, when I press this button I shall be no more. astral body to Mars at once by Fin- stein’s. Dynamic Express Mars! Please ship my oming, To HAVE passed you many times upon the streets; my hand has brushed against you; my eyes have met yours, and an unforgettable passed between us. I cannot mistake its meaning. You love me. And I shall make your love secure. I shall hold it forever. For I am never going to speak to you. message has WHERE A MAN FEELS LIKE GOING NOW- ADAYS AFTER HE HAS EATEN IN A RES~ TAURANT comicbooks.com