Life — August 1, 1918 — page 31: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

The Necessity of Appearing Important ‘AN could get a great deal more valuable work done during his life's span if he didn’t have to spend so much time on figuring how he can appear important. If he could only grasp, with a clear and all-embracing comprehension, the fact that he is merely an atom in the boundless universe, and then act in accordance with that conviction, his efficiency would be increased an hundredfold and the happiness in his cup would be much nearer the brim. But he can’ "t, and so there is really no use talking about it. He will go on strutting and prinking and decorating himself and bluffing and boasting to the bitter end. HAVE YOU A SWEETHEART, Son or Brother in training camps in the American Army or Navy? If so, mail him a package of ALLEN'S FOOT=EASE, the antiseptic powder to be shaken into the shoes and sprinkled in the foot-bath. The American, British and French troops use Allen's Foot-Ease, because it takes the Friction from the Shoe and freshens the feet. It is the greatest comforter for tired, aching, tender, swollen feet, and gives relief to corns and bunfons, The Plattsburg Camp Manual advises men in training to shake Foot~Ease in their shoes each morning. Ask your dealer to-day for a 25c. box of Allen's Foot=Fase, and for a 2c, stamp be will mail it for you, What remembrance Feet=Eeee could be so acceptable? A limited number of FreeTrial Packages of Allen's Foot-Ease will be forwarded, charges prepaid, to, VANITY FAIR The most successful of all the new magazines rtistic stim, tear the coupon in the lotcer left hand corner of this page eed mail it, Don’t Be a Social Back Number— If you are out of step with the whirling progress of our time; if you are removed from its magnetic influences; if, despite your youth, you are becoming an old fogey, of an old maid, or an old bachelor, or an old bore; if your joie de viore is dying at the roots—then you must read Vanity Fair, and presto! you will be nimble-witted and agile-minded again—the joy of the picnic—the life of the party—the little ray of sunshine in the gloom of Six months of Vanity Fair will enable you to ignite a dinner party at fifty yards Don't settle down comfortably in the o-te. The world is moving, moving on all sight cylinders—some .olks are even moving on twelve —and you might just as well move along with them. Don’t stall If on life's highroad and be satisfied to take everybody else’s dust. Hop up and take a little joy ride on the red and yellow band-wagon — Vanity Fair's band-wagon. Every Issue of Vanity Fair Contains: PERSONALITIES: Portraits and reve- SPORTS! The war bas affected In many lations of the best known figures. over potable ways the building ef automobilen, there and over bere, not to mention the alrubipa, mrotorveate, Ita effects upen writers, witsand workers who aregiviog them are treated (n the pages of Vanity (of their boot to win the war. fale. ESSAYS AND ARTICLES: THE STAGE: A pancrama of New York's theatre: reviews of the most dazntless comedies, the roost etimalatiog WORLD AFVAIRS! Accurate, taferm- Ure ‘and Inepiriting articles desling ‘with American polltics and policies ta the MUMOR AND SKETCHES: Theron! eveat war. ‘eat epota fa the bright elde of the war: Sclaiere, near soldiers, oflcers, and ear-oficers: workers and pear-workers secen by young and daring artists and wears. Try a Little Dollar Diplomacy! You think nothing—in your poor deluded way—of payin, $2.00 for a theatre ticket, or for a new book, but for only $1.00 you can secure five months of Vanity Fair,—six if mail the coupon now—and with it more entertainment than you can derive from dozens of sex plays or a shelf full of Problem novels. Mustrations copyright by Vanity Fair If you want your brain kept powdered ad welll groomed } for rix months, just tear off, fill in end mail the little coupon below We PromiseYou, Solemnly that Vanity Fair is not just one more magazine, or even @ new magazine of an old kind — but an ALTO- GETHER NEW KIND OF MAGAZINE. It’s = entertai entertaining Magazine for ‘We are not going to pri pas es covers. We are ‘roing 10 spare you the agony of ‘sex discussions. We shall caae eae oe eg es Jem stories. No ertickeoa Belgium, or irrigation, or railroad rates, or food conservation, or any other statistical subject. Condé Nast Publisher Frank Crowninshield Editor ‘Three Dollars a Year any War Rellet Committee for making up Comfort Kits. A Address, Allen 8, Olmsted, Le Roy 1918 Edition of Alice in Wonderland H thought it was a roast of beef Within the pantry neat. He looked again, and saw it was A substitute for meat. “If this is all we've got,” he said, “I'll go elsewhere to eat.’ He thought it was a gal. of gas Within the auto tan! He looked again, and saw it was No more than could be drank. And when he'd paid the price he found His roll of bills had shrank. He thought it was a grassy lawn Went sloping to the street. He looked again, and saw it was Laid down to winter wheat. Green vegetables grew everywhere He tried to set his feet. He thought it was the same dull world That he had always known. He looked again, and saw it was Agog, awhirl, afoam. He shrank away, and one could hear His last expiring groan. Mary Hoadley Griswold. Why Not End the War? STRONG movement having set in to conscript wealth, we desire to call attention to a monied class which hitherto has apparently escaped the at- tention of our lawmakers. But it does not scem as if domestic servants could longer escape. Cooks, we regret to say, are now getting practically all the money we have, Besides this, they receive free board and lodging. That the surplus wealth now being accumu- lated by cooks and other domestics should immediately be conscripted goes without saying. Let us get the war over with as soon as possible.