Life, 1918-03-07 · page 34 of 40
Life — March 7, 1918 — page 34: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Life* magazine is primarily **advertisements and humorous anecdotes** rather than political cartoons. The humor pieces mock contemporary social situations: a man reads calmly during a boat crisis, trusting paid crew; a theater actress complains about receiving only nine bouquets when she paid for ten; a wife protests a hotel lacking a fire escape; and a woman contradictorily claims her baby girl is also a girl. The Herbert Tareyton cigarette ad features a caricatured man smoking, using the appeal "There's *something* about them you'll like." Most significantly, the bottom text ironically credits professors at German universities (Bonn and Heidelberg) with claiming that had their "Simian ancestors" read *Life* magazine regularly, human evolution would have advanced thousands of years—a backhanded compliment to the magazine's intellectual value wrapped in evolutionary humor typical of the era. The page reflects early 20th-century American humor: gentle satire of everyday absurdities and human contradiction, with no apparent partisan political content.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
OUR FOOLISH ASPB TS) ARIES Let Them Do the Worrying Amos J. Cummings and Ernest Jarrold were once in a pilot-boat during a great storm. The former lay on a bunk, in- tently reading. The boat gave a fearful lurch, and careened until it seemed that she must turn completely over. “This is awful, Amos!” said Jarrold. m going to put on a life-preserver, for the boat can't stand it many minutes longer.” “Ob, keep quiet and let me read, Mickey!” said Cummings, never lifting his eyes. “The men on this boat draw a regular salary to keep her afloat!” —Saturday Evening Post. Breach of Contract Maxacer: What's the leading lady in such a tantrum about? Press Acent: She only got nine bou- quets over the footlights to-night. “Great Scott! Isn't that enough?” “No. She paid for ten.” —London Fun, | Pinch, use ALLEN'S FOOT-EASE_ Fire Water Only Creek (in small-town hotel): Will you have a pitcher of water sent to your LONEL BLUEGRASS Water?) What Ain't there any fire-escape? —Boston Transcript. Mes. Frarsust: Does your husband believe in the protection of our forests? Mrs. Bexsoxuurst: Does he? Why, say, if ever we had another war over here that would be the first place he'd make for!—Yonkers Statesman. SY Ti (Tre yt London zy ton Herbert Jerevian London Smoking ore | ymple upon reque: Falk’ Tobaces Co, SBWestas" St. NewYork. BELL-. -ANS Absolutely Removes Indigestion. One package proves it. 25c at all druggists. EARNS WENDY EGYPTIAN DEITIES Belfer PREFER Deities any other cigarte. 25* Finargyss tates of He est Code eth ont Eppa Ciparencs Simple Sit line” wrist or strap. FOR Always Contrary Mark Twain, so the story goes, was walking on Hannibal Street when he met a woman with her youthful family “So this is the little girl, ech?" Mark said to her as she displayed her children. And this sturdy litde urchin in the bib belongs, I suppose, to the contrary sex.” “Yassah,” the woman replied; “ yas- sah, dat’s a girl, too.” —Christian Register. A Boomerang “What's this?” asked the acquitted man. “The bill for my services,” said the lawyer. “Go on! You proved that T was in- sane, didn’t you?” “Yes.” “Well, you can't do business with an insane man. You ought to know that.” —Transcript. Sexceaxt-Majox: Now, Private Smith, you know very well none but officers and non-commissioned officers are allowed to walk across the grass. Private Suitn: But, Sergeant-Major, I've Captain Graham's oral orders to— Serceant-Mayor: None o’ that, sir. Show me the captain's oral orders. Show ‘erpool Post. ERR Professor Erdnuss of the University of Bonn and Privat- docent Wansenpulver of Heidelberg concur in the belief that, if our Simian ancestors had been able to read and had become regular subscribers to Lirr, the evolution of man would have been hastened by thousands of years. We Get You, Dulcinea Jack Spratt will eat no fat, His wife will eat no lean— A patriotic couple, that, If you know what T mean. —Transeript. Deference “Do you think it is proper to use pro fanity to a mule?” "So far a my own’ feelings are com cerned,” declared the expert teamster, “it is highly improper. But when yoa are trying to get along with as sensitive and exacting an animal simply got to humor hin —Washington Star. “ Au wants the day off, boss, ter look fo’ a job fo" mah wife.” “Will you be back to-morrow?” “Yes, ef she don't git it.” —Boston Transcript. To restore depleted energy and take o new vigor and vim—drink ‘Pte date Groce ©. EVANS & SONS. Ea