Life, 1917-12-06 · page 72 of 92
Life — December 6, 1917 — page 72: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This Life magazine page contains two distinct pieces of satire: **Left side - "It Might Be Different Then":** A commentary on Congressional budget mismanagement during World War I. The piece satirizes how Congress estimated war spending at $1 billion monthly but actual costs reached $324 million—three times the estimate. The joke imagines if Congress members personally had to pay these bills from their own pockets, they'd suddenly become fiscally responsible, unlike when spending "other people's money." **Right side - "A Declaration of Independence":** A humorous mock-serious parody of the Declaration of Independence, written in 1918 as wartime satire. It presents a "declaration" about the high cost of living during the war, arguing that citizens should abandon expensive gift-giving traditions. The piece ironically frames frugality as a patriotic duty, using grandiose founding-document language to justify not buying Christmas presents—a darkly comic comment on economic hardship. Both satirize wartime financial strain on ordinary Americans.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
FIREARMS REVOLVERS AUTOMATIC PISTOLS AUTOMATIC MACHINE GUNS For nearly three-quarters of a century COLT’S FIRE- ARMS have played a dominant part in the brilliant military achievements of our country. COLT’S are the REVOLVERS and AUTO- MATIC PISTOLS that have been officially adopted by the United States Government.’ For individual home protection you can safely place your trust in the firearms on which Uncle Sam has put his unqualified O.K. COLT’S “* The Proven Best by Government Test ** Utustrated catalog @ maited free on request COLT’S PATENT FIREARMS Hartford, Conn., U.S. A. It Might Be Different Then I" seems that the estimates made hy to spend other people's money. Im- Congress of how much money we agine Congress, if the members. indi- for the war were put vidually had to foot up the bills out of es, making a similar mis- would sp down at one billion a month, but in ongressman would be armed with an array of figures that would put any expert accountant to the actual practice we are spending only $324,000.000 a month. So that Con- gress was three times over the mark, Mush. This illustrates the pleasant truth And wha that it is the easiest thing in the world contractors! a difference for the army A Declaration of Independence Wwe events it becomes 1 the inhabitants of a high-priced country to in their righteous m7 and break away from the time-tried cus- tom of useless giving, and to assume in the course of luman ssary for among the free people of the earth th; titude to which the high cost of living and the onus of war have brought them, a decent regard for the spirit of Christmas requires them to break the news gently. We hold these truths to be self-evi- dent: that all our friends are in an equally ; that they are endowed hy their Creator with certain inalien- common-sense and economical at- able rights, among which are life, lib- erty and the pursuit of necessities— but that to secure these rights, a no- compulsory-gift policy must be intro- duced, deriving an added justification from the evil of senseless and wasteful giving hitherto prevalent; and that, since the spirit of friendship is really grounded on good-will and leanings of the heart, requiring no interchange of expensive testimonials, it is our right and duty to abolish the cause of after- holiday bills and confusion, and to est our yule-tide feelings solely by kisses, hand-shakes and)“ Merry Christmas” wishes. “AJOW, Bobbie, you mustn’t tell any body that you saw me kissing your sister.” Aw, that’s what they all say!” * Big * War Map Sent Free! Most complete single map of the We oy ced ‘Americ — rm, Front ever pabthhed., vt on cloth, greatly incrrasiog Ps comicbookSfeom In