Life — September 13, 1917 — page 36: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

WM. 2. RETTS, AL (1 436 OUR_ FOOLISH | CON me Full Particulars Free They were seated in a tramear—the mother and her little boy The conductor eyed the little boy sus- piciously. He had to keep a lookout for people who pretended that their children were younger than they really were, in order to obtain free rides for them, ‘And how. old is: your little: boy, madam, p! “Three a half,” said the mother truthfully “ Right, satisfied Little Willie pondered a minute. It seemed to him that fuller information was required. “And mother’s Tit-Bits. ma‘am.” suid the conductor thirty-one.” he said politely “THE MANOR” Asheville, North Carolina TEMPORARIES BX pad AN: IN AMERICA—AN ENGLISH INN— Perfect GOLF. Luck nervous freshman met Jones of Yale one morning and found himself obliged to walk with the dean, who was a friend of his family. Chimes ringing at a church they were passing made him attempt a con versation. “T think those chimes are wonderful.” he said. No answer, “Aren't those chimes exquisite?" he stammered. Still no response. Those are the most beau tiful raised his voice a bit “Did you speak?” said the dean, 1 can't hear on account of those infernal Home Journal. A very Dean out of chapel chimes “—he chimes! "—Ladies* THE BETTS SCHOO “Mum” (as easy to use as to say) L how neutralizes all body odors —and doesthisquickly, safelyand Doesn't smother economically. one odor with another, nor check normal excretions. a minute—use very little. 2Se at drug: and department-stures Applied in “Mune” is a Trade Mark registered in U.S. Patent Office MUM" MFG CO 1106 Chestnut St Philadelphia LISTERINE The Safe Antiseptic Prevents infection of cuts and wounds. It is also a refreshin? toilet lotion for use after shaving. When the “S” Fell Out "We are thorry to. tha the editor of the Skedunk Ice! “that our compothing-room wath entered lath night by thome unknown theoundrel, who thtole every ‘eth’ in the ethtablith ment, and thuceceded in’ making hith etheape undetected. “The motive of the mithereant doubt leth wath revenge for thome thuppothed inthult. “ite never be thaid that the petty thpite of any thmall-thouled villain hath dithabled the Newth, and if thith meet the eye of the detethtable ratheal, we bez hure him that he underethtimated to a the rethourceth of a firtht-clath newth paper when he thinkth he can cripple it hopelethly by breaking into the alphabet We take oceathion to thay to him fur thermore that before next Thurthday we thall have three timeth ath he thtole. “We have reathor to thuthpect th we know the cowardly thkunk who co mitted thith act of vandalithm, and if he ith ever theen prowling about thith ethtablithment nothing tion th holeth. ath many etheth M give uth om to thoot hith Tit-Bits. hide full of Who Knows? A lad in a Chicago school refused to learn to sew, evidently deeming it. be neath the dignity of a ten-year-old man “George Washington sewed,” said the instructor, “he took it for granted that a soldier must. Do you consider yourself better than George Washington ? © “T don't know,” said the boy seriously. “time will tell."—Harper’s was on the Field of the Cloth Gold. King Henry had just b kissed on both cheeks by King Francis my royal coz,” said the a look at this 1 subscribe, but my change of H “And now, former, “may Thi k's copy of Lave? neglected to forward address | With a Motive “There's a girl who is always anxious te take my part. * A devoted friend, eh? ~ “My ned the star simply.—Louisritle Courier-Journal, understudy.” exph They increase | nd reduce wages. HINK OR PAY A taxon land Valuesonly will raise yearly $5 ill abolishall other taxe rpetuate teal prosperity. te Booklet Free IE, Arden, Delaware, Dept. 32 ot, MEN, IGARS | @MADE AT KEY WEST — comicbooksgeqmy