Life — July 12, 1917 — page 34: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Quite Reckless The barber was finishing lathering a customer, and was talking volubly as usual. “Yes, sir,” he said, “we have to mind what we're about here. Every time we cut a customer's face we are fined a‘ tan- ner,’ and if we make an ugly gash it costs usa ‘bob’! Then, picking up and brandishing a razor, he added: “But I don't care a hang to-day. I've just won a ‘quid’! —Tit-Bits. Give Us the Chance E. When Booth Tarkington was visiting Naples he was present at an eruption of Vesuvius. “You haven't anything like that in America, have you?” said an Italian friend with pride. | Sy SUT Scissors =} AuTNULLUS Mistakes Will Happen A woman doctor of Philadelphia was calling on a young sister, recently mar- tied, who was in distress. In response to the doctor's inquiry the newly-wed I cooked a meal for the first time yesterday, and IT made an awful mess i of it.” H “Never mind, dearie,” said the doctor, cheerfully ; “it's nothing to worry about. I lost my first paticnt.”"—Harper's. Advice to Poets “Ts it necessary to enclose stamps?” asked the eet “but sieve eae Falls that would | t “More necessary even than to enclose ut we've got Niagara Falls that would cu put the d—d thing out in five minutes.” | 714 poetry,” responded the experienced au- thor.—London Opinion, —Ladies’ Home Journal. “ Every time I sing in public I give the proceeds to charity. “Your conscience fund, I suppose. Boos (making conversation): 1 passed your house to-day. “Good GRACIOUS, MARY! WHAT AM I EATING?” Sue (absently): Oh, thank you ever “CAULIFLOWER AU GRATIN, I MADE IT OUT OF so much.—Wid« TWO TURNIPS AND A CUP OF RICE.” —The Lamb. ay be obtained from book trade supplied frox EC Lire is for sale by all newsdealers in Great Britain and rs in all the principal cities in the world. The ’s London Office, Rolls House, Breams Buildings, Li tribution will be returned unless accompanied by ot hold itself responsible for the loss or ire is published every Thursday, si y in the United States, ¢ Canada and British Possessions. Title registered in U. S. Patent Office. $ in advance. Additional postage to foreign countries in the Postal Union, $1.05 a years to Canada, 52 cents. Single current copies, 10 cents. Back numbers, after three months poation. from date of publication, 25 cents. Issues prior to 1910 out of print. Cee aanteutions The text and illustrations in Lire are copyrighted. For Reprint Rights in Great Bi ice of change of address should reach this office ten days prior to the date ¢ Buildings, Fetter Lane, Lon: a ts be agectan: and addresses return of wear is, “Are you fond of rice. Miss Hen? ™ “Ob, Mr. Leghorn! Te-hee, this is so sudden!" We Give It Away The Miniature Edition of Ye Jones (who has mistaken his neighbor's Number Four apartment for his own): Sh! Not (hic) THE STATE ROAD nuzzer word, my dear! We'll talk thish As it seems when you are just learning over in the morning. Now Ready Long experience has demonstrated to us that this little Lire is great, not only to little men, but to big men, medium men and all women and children. It is of course beau- tifully printed in colors, and in all respects is an exact reproduction in miniature of the larger Lire. It contains the best things that have appeared in Lire for a number of years. Do you want a copy? Send us your address and name and a perfectly good, uncancelled U. S. two-cent stamp, and you will receive it by return mail. Gre sew York ing sel comicbooksseany U Lire, 17 West 31st Sirce?,