Life, 1917-04-05 · page 57 of 70
Life — April 5, 1917 — page 57: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page mixes satire with advertising. The cartoon at top depicts two rotund gentlemen in top hats near the Capitol building. One asks the other to pass a law "abolishing osteopathy and prosecuting everyone cured by it, Senator?" **The satire:** This mocks anti-osteopathy sentiment among medical establishment figures (likely doctors or politicians influenced by the American Medical Association, which opposed osteopathy in this era). The absurdity—prosecuting people for being healed—exposes the illogic of those opposing the emerging osteopathic profession on principle rather than merit. The rest of the page features "The Dog's Commandments," a humorous piece by Christopher Morley presenting pet-ownership ethics as biblical law, and advertisements for Tiffany & Co. and Oriental incense. The quote at bottom about newspaper subscriptions humorously invokes free speech ("I care not who makes the laws") while reducing citizenship to consumer loyalty—likely satirizing American materialism.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
“woul YOU MIND PASSING A LAW ASOLISHI SG OSTROFATHY AND PROSECUT ING EVERVONE CURED BY IT, SENATOR?” The Dog's Commandments ROM a witless puppy I brought thee gave thee fire and food, and thee the self-respect of an honest dog. Hear, then, my command- ments: lam thy master: thou shalt have no other masters before me. Where it thou follow; where I abide, hou also. My house is thy castle; thou shalt honor it; guard it with thy life if need | . By daylight, suffer all that approach peaceally to enter without protest. The Oriental Store cense Set $1 -amy, soothing fragrance of Vantine’s le Incense brings to mind the rosy dawns, the Enlliant sunlight, the purple dusks of the the encharement of strange Far Eastern coun. the subsle, ous sweetness of tropical gar- and of blossom-laden breezes blown from palm. lands set in turquoise seas. SI. and. we will forward by parcel post post: J ne set ilhustrated which includes oxidized burner and ‘our-ounce packet of incense, both neatly packed artic Onental case and complete instrucnons ning incense. (Specify No. 1002 D. Write for Catalog TIFFANY & Co. JEWELRY SILVERWARE THE HIGHEST QUALITY ASSURES PERMANENT SATISFACTION Tue TiFFANY BLUE Book-NoT ILLUSTRATED GIVES DESCRIPTIONS AND PRICES FIFTH AVENUE & 37 STREET New York But after nightfall thou shalt give tongue when men draw near. Use not thy teeth on any man with- out good cause and intolerable provo- cation; and never on women or chil- dren, Honor thy master and thy mistress, that thy days may be long in the land. Thou shalt not consort with mon- grels, nor with dogs that are common or unclean Thou shalt not steal. Thou shalt not feed upon refuse or stray bits: thy meat waits tHee regularly in the kitchen, Thou shalt not bury bones in the flower beds. Cats are to be chased, but in sport only; seek not to devour them: their teeth and claws are deadly. Thou shalt not snap at my neighbor, nor at his wife, nor his child, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor do harm to aught that is his. The drawing-room rug is not for thee, nor the sofa, nor the best arm- chair. Thou hast the porch and thy own kennel. But for the love I bear thee, there is always a corner for thee by the winter fire. Meditate on these commandments day and night; so shalt thou be a dog of good breeding and an honor to thy master. Christopher Morley. “7 CARE not who makes the laws of my country,” said Béranger, “if only I am sure that my newsdealer has not forgotten the standing order I gave him for my ly copy of Lire.” comichooks, FcCOomMm