Life, 1917-01-11 · page 34 of 38
Life — January 11, 1917 — page 34: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several short humorous anecdotes typical of early 20th-century American humor magazines. The main political reference is **William Jennings Bryan**, the three-time Democratic presidential candidate. The opening joke contrasts Bryan's exhaustion with supporters who claim perpetual loyalty versus those who say they've never voted for him—suggesting the latter's honesty is more refreshing than hollow partisan promises. Other content includes: - A joke about a boy's appetite ("I ain't so little as I look from the outside") - A museum guard mistaking classical sculpture for Theda Bara (a famous silent film actress), playing on her exotic film roles - Workplace humor about stenographers and new "motor business" terminology not yet in dictionaries - Advertisements for golf balls, Egyptian cigarettes, and Wilson whiskey The page reflects period concerns: political rhetoric, silent cinema culture, and emerging automobile industry jargon. The whiskey ad emphasizes "self-controlled men" and moderation—likely coded language given Prohibition era debates.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
OLISH ORARIES The Kind That Makes Bryan Tired At a recent Missouri Chautauqua a man came to William J. Bryan and told him time you've run, Mister Brine, an’ I'll be glad to vote fer you agin, as offen as possible.” Mr. Bryan thanked him, and a fellow lyceum worker said: “Don't you get awfully tired of having men come up and declare they've always voted for you and always will?” “No, indeed,” said Mr. Bryan, “ The people that make me tired are the ones that say they've never voted for me and never will."—Ladies’ Home Journal. Appearances Deceptive The aunt of a little boy was amazed at the appetite exhibited by him during a recent stay in her household. “Mercy!” she exclaimed one day. But you certainly eat a terrible lot, Willie, for such a little fellow!” Willie, however, was not at all upset by this. “T expect,” he rejoined, “that I ain't so little as I look from the outside.” —Columbus Citizen. Sliced Oranges with a dash of Abbott's Bitters are appettz- Ingand healthfal. Sample of bitters by mall 25 cts. In stamps C.W. Abbott & Co., Baltimore, Md. Prim Orv Girt (at art museum): And this, I presume, is Cleopatra, the Theda Bara of her day? Ewcuisit Caretaker: On the contrary, madame, this is the Venus de Milo. Quite ‘armless, madame, quite ‘armless. —Sun Dial. DUNLOP GOLF BALLS for record smashing! famous British-made balls were used by S Tyentis erate cere tee Lawrence: Cpe en gee Cala, Su Ca: Feeney Secreta ae (goedium) and (heavy), For sate by golf proferrionalsandgotfelubs, Siperdozen, Teach DUNLOP RUBBER CO., LTD., Birmingham, Eng. Up Against It “T don't always get stenographers who can spell.” “Refer ‘em to the dictionary, old chap.” “But I'm in the motor business. And that has produced a flock of words that haven't gotten into the dictionary as yct.” —Louisville Courier-Journal. Overheard in a Book Store Prosrective Customer (to saleslady) : Have you something in books for about a dollar and a half? —The Evening Sun. In business you know many self- controlled men. successful? Aren’t they usually And away from business won’t you find them moderate in other things? It is for just such men that we make a wonderfully mild and mellow Whiskey —Wilson— Real Wilson— That’s All! The Whiskey for which we invented the, Non-Refillable Bottle FREE CLUB RECIPES—Free booklet of famous club recipes for mixed drinks. Address Wilson, 13 E. 31st St, N. Y. That's All! UNSUNG HEROES THE BOY WHO HAD BEEN WISHING FOR A comicbooks.com