Life, 1916-12-07 · page 49 of 94
Life — December 7, 1916 — page 49: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This is a Christmas fantasy playlet by Thomas L. Masson featuring Father Time and Mother Goose meeting to discuss Santa Claus's troubles. The satire appears to be **early-20th-century social commentary**: Father Time is skeptical of visitors asking him to extend their lives, but welcomes Mother Goose as a fellow immortal. The humor rests on treating mythological/literary figures as real beings affected by contemporary concerns. Mother Goose mentions that "the war" has been straining Santa Claus's nerves—likely referencing **World War I** and its cultural impact. The joke suggests that even timeless, magical figures cannot escape modern anxieties. The piece gently satirizes how global conflict disrupts even cherished traditions and the innocence associated with Christmas lore.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Christmas Life Turning the Tables on Santa Claus A Christmas Fantasy By Thomas L, Masson Scene: Father Time's Horologium. Late afternoon, the day before Christmas, Father Time busy «writing at his desk, Enter boy. Boy: Someone to see you, sir. FatuHer Time: Tell ’em I'm not at home. Same old story, | suppose. 1 wonder why people will always call asking me to extend their years, when they know it is not in my power to grant their request. Boy: Beg pardon, sir, but the lady particularly said that she was one of the Immortals, destined to live as long as you, and she had no favor to ask, but just wished to see you on a matter of mutual interest. Fatuer Time: One of the Immortals, eh? Yes. Ha, ha! I’ve heard that story before. They always say that when they find they can’t get in. What does she look like? If she’s young and handsome— Boy: Beg pardon, sir, she’s a lovely old lady with a peaked hat and the most delightful smile, and always cracking a joke like. She's aboundin’ with fun. I wish you might see her, sir. Fatuer Time: What's her name? Boy: Mother Goose; so she said, sir. Fatner Time: Mother Goose! Why in the universe didn’t you say so before? Immortal! Well, I should say so! (Actually runs out to the door, opens it, and holds out both hands.) My dear old friend! I'm simply delighted! Just thinking about you cheers me up, and I nced it, I assure you! Come right in. Any new stories? That cow-jump- ing-over-the-moon joke of yours makes me laugh every time I think of it. Some jump, eh? Motuer Goose: Same old jollier, aren't you? But you can't make me grow any older by touching me with your old wand. You're look- ing well, considering everything. Now, my friend, let’s get down to business. I’ve come on an important mission. It’s about Santa Claus. Fatuer Time: Hope nothing serious has happened to him. Last time I saw him he wasn’t looking so well as usual. Motuer Goose: Well, you know the war has been getting on his nerves horribly, and then, everybody thinks they know so much more 1029 Sevens