Life, 1916-09-21 · page 38 of 44
Life — September 21, 1916 — page 38: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This article satirizes judicial restraint and the frustration of judges forced to remain silent throughout lengthy legal proceedings. The author uses a hypothetical case—person A accuses person B of stealing a purse—to illustrate how judges must suppress their opinions while lawyers conduct exhaustive research into precedents, constitutions, and circumstances over years. The satire's point: by the time a judge might finally render judgment, the case is often resolved through compromise (here, the lawyers dividing the purse's contents), leaving the judge's hard-won wisdom uselessly suppressed. The cartoon below ("Tied in the Seventh") visually reinforces this—showing a chaotic crowd scene with the caption about someone apparently disinterested, likely illustrating the public's frustration with judicial delays and non-involvement. The page also includes period advertisements for Arrow Collars and Hardman tires, typical of Life's commercial content.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Judges JUDGE is the nearest approach to an abject which the twentieth century can boast. If he giv ions they must not be his own. If he has opinions of his own must not give them. . For instance, a thorough-going Judge could not quote that line of Shakespeare's, “Who steals my purse steals trash.” No matter how decided his views or deep his convictions, he must say nothing. He must sit down and wait and hope. Then some day a man, whom we may call A, comes along and says that B has stolen his purse. When A makes his assertion, the Judge, carefully refrain- ing from comment, must take several months to decide whether the assertion is made in the proper form and in language sufficiently Blackstonian. Then B comes along and admits he stole the purse, but sets up the defense that the purse was trash and therefore not worth fighting about. Then the lawyers are called in again, and for several years they look up the law and the prophets, the precedents and the decisions, the constitutions and the statutes, the intent, the provocation and the circumstances. The whole Baconian theory is reexamined and made a part of the record. An attempt is made to discover whether A was rightfully pos- eas sessed of the purse in the first place, While all this is going c on the Judge must maintain an unbroken silence. Finally the thing is threshed out to a point where an opin- ‘ ion is imminent. Then the discovery is made that it was not Are made to give good service. a purse at all, but a wallet; that it was bought as a wallet, ‘The ‘style, make, durability and sold as a wallet and distinctly designated as such by the seller, ish leave nothing to’ be desired a certain department store, marked Exhibit E. event by those willing to pay a As this makes everything defective and introduces the new higher price “45 each 6 for 90c question as to whether the trash theory applies to wallets as . well as to purses, the whole matter must be gone over again. In the meantime the Judge is hiding in his bosom a sapient mn which is eating his heart out, At last the day seems to have arrived when the lawyers are unable to drag out the case any longer. The Judge perks up. He is about to be a somebody. But alas! disappointment is again his lot. His fetters are not loosed, for he is informed that the case has been com- promised by dividing the contents of the purse among the lawyers. Considered a profitable investment by those who have used them— "SURE-GRIP™ @-TIRES— Extra heavy traction tread—a feature of superior construction. Guaranteed for 5,000 miles. Hardman Tire and Rubber Co. 1904 Broadway 19 BROADWAY, Western Di 25 Stuigan Avenue Chie Factory: Belleville, N. TIED IN THE SEVENTH “JOUN! APPARENTLY 1 DON’T INTEREST YOU”