Life — April 6, 1916 — page 54: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

SAUT SCISSORS AvT NULLUS To instill into the’ mind of his son sound wisdom and business precepts was Cohen senior’s earnest endeavor. He taught his offspring much, including the advantages of bankruptcy, failures, and fires. “ Two bankruptcies equal one fail ure, two failures equal one fire,” ete. Then Cohen junior looked up brightly. Fader,” he asked, “is marriage a jure?" Vell, my poy,” was the parent's reply, “if you marry a really wealthy woman, marriage is almost as good as a failure.” —Tit-Bits. “War are you studying now?" asked Mrs. Johnson, “We have taken up the subject of molecules,” answered her son. “T hope you will be very attentive and practise constantly,” said the moth- er. “I tried to get your father to wear one, but he could not keep it in his eye.” —Kansas City Star. DON'T BUY A NEW CAR UNTIL YOU MAVE TESTED ITS CARRYING CAPACITY Anzac Lirutenant: The Turks are as thick as peas. What shall we do? Awzac Captain: Shell them, you idiot, shell them !—Tit-Bits. What's in a Name? “Your daughter,” said Mrs. Oldcastle, after being conducted through the’ newly furnished wing of the magnificent palace occupied by the new-rich Byllingtons, “has such a splendid. vocabulary.” “Do you think so?” her,hostess re- plied. “ Josiah wanted to’get her one of them escritoires, but I made up my mind right at the start that a vocabukiry would look better in a room furnished like hers, even if it didn’t cost quite so much.” —Toronto Globe. The Intelligent Cat Two suburban gardeners were swearing vengeance on cats. “Tt appears to me,” one said, “ that they seem to pick out your choicest plants to scratch out of the ground.” “ There's a big tomcat,” the other said, that fetches my plants out and then sits and actually defies me.” “Why don’t you hurl a brick at him?" asked the first speaker. “ That's what makes me mad,” was the reply. “I can't. He gets on top of my greenhouse to defy me.” —London Opinion. “We have such good news from the front! Dear Charles is safely wounded at last."—Rogue. for sale by all newsdealers in Great Britain and may be obtained from book Lire is published every Thursday, simultaneously in the United States, Great Britain, ; Canada and British Possessions. $5.00 a year in advance. Additional postage to in all the principal cities in the world. The foreign trade supplied from foreign countries in the Postal Union, $1.94 a years to Canada, s2 cents Single cur- 's London Office, Rolis House, Breams Buildings, London, E. C. f rent copies, to cents, Back numbers, alter three months from date of publication, No contribution will be returned unless accompanied by stamped and addressed 25 cents. issues prior to 19104 out of print . envelope. Lire, does not hold itself responsible for the loss or non-return of wnto- The text and illustrations in Live are copyrighted. For Reprint Rights i licited contributions. , apply to Lirt, Rolls House, Breams Buildings, Fetter Lane, London, Prompt notifcation should be sent by subscribers of any change of address. TATOOSH RAUGE ‘CLIFF GEYSER CASCADE MOUNTAINS YELLOWSTONE PARK Plan NOW to Visit Yellowstone National Park j THIS SUMMER s See the geysers, canyons, mountains, colored terraces, paint pots, petri- fied trees, the wild animals, beautiful rivers, lakes and falls, etc. {This is truly the natural museum of the world. Nowhere can one duplicate the sights of wonderland. Excellent large hotels; comfortable camps. Start your tour at Gardiner Gateway, the original, logical and only northern entrance, reached only by the Northern Pacific Railway Through trains to Yellowstone National Park, Rainier National Park and the North Pacific Coast. Scenery unexcelled—three ranges of mountains, including the American Rockies and Cascades. Dining car service internationally popular. The Route of the Great Big Baked Potato. Connections at Seattle, Tacoma and Portland with Steamship lines and Shasta Route for California points; Great Northern Pacific S.S. Co. between Portland-Astoria and San Francisco. Send for free travel literature and details. comicbooks.com