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Life, 1916-02-10 · page 41 of 44

Life — February 10, 1916 — page 41: what you’re looking at

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Life — February 10, 1916 — page 41: Life, 1916-02-10

What you’re looking at

This page contains primarily **advertisements and a short story**, not political cartoons. The main narrative, "If They Told the Truth," is a brief humorous exchange where a parishioner compliments a preacher's sermons while inadvertently insulting him by praising the "variety of stupidity" in them. The joke is that the compliment-giver doesn't realize he's being rude, while the preacher responds diplomatically. The longer featured story concerns a "professional pledger"—a man who solicits donations for temperance/sobriety pledges and pockets money from wealthy donors. After years of this scheme, he finally accumulates enough to buy his daughter an annuity. However, she writes asking his consent to become a nun instead, negating his financial goal. The irony and his spiritual acceptance form the story's moral conclusion. The remaining content is **commercial advertising** for Crème Yvette dessert liqueur, floral delivery service, and Packer's Tar Soap—typical early 20th-century magazine fare with no satirical intent.

📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

x9 Delicious Desserts Something different, dainty and di- verting—a Créme Yvette violet des- sert is attractive and distinctive in colour as well as taste. Give a real touch of individuality to your next tea, or bridge party. Your guests will be delighted. Créme Yvette can be used in many ways—in making violet ices, cake icings, jellies, charlottes, puddings, candies, etc. A dash in the coffee gives a fine bouquet. Two sizes—8oc and $1.50 per bottle. Ask your grocer or wine dealer for a free sample. A book of signed recipes by well- known Chefs sent free for your dealer's name and address. Write today. SHEFFIELD COMPANY 7th Ave., at 14th St. New York CREME ( Pronounced) Evet)) shor Smart Desse FRESH FLOWERS TO ANYWHERE Dinance is dead. Fresh cut flowers not 24 prices delivered anywhere ia remittance stating selection dared; satisfaction guaranteed; estimates and booklets sent on request. National Floral Corporation, 220 Broadway, N.Y. hours old at local the U. S. | Send ible pledger is sure to pocket a do- n each time he takes the pledge. The professional pledger must be a traveler, of course. Most of the cities can be “ worked to a finish” in a week. at there are three, at least, which have ven the King of the Pledgers, with sobriety and diligence, busy for four or five months. As I have said, I was exceedingly suc- cessful. Two weeks ago, my bank ac- count, piled up through pledging only, totalled $9,902.00. With eighty-eight additional dollars, I would have enough to purchase for my daughter the annuity —sufficient to keep her comfortable all her life—that than nine ye: Three ti one since I took her to the convent. The last time she was sixteen and a happy, gentle, flower-like girl, gladden- ingly and saddeningly like her mother. And I wrote her and heard from her every month, Well, that day, two weeks ago, when I'd found myself so near my goal, I went out to “work” as usual. My victim was xu young priest just ordained, the son of a multi-millionaire, who had given up a brilliant worldly position, I was the first person to whom he administered the pledge. He was moved to the core. And he gave me . . . one hundred dol- lars. My life work was done. In almost childlike glee, I ran back to my room, there to draw the check necessary for the immediate purchase of my girl's annuity, And there I found a letter from the child. She asked for my fatherly consent— that she might enter the Dominican Sis- ters’ Order as a novice. She had a true vocation, said she, had always meant to be a nun. And now that she was cigh- teen . . . “it is my heart's wish, father, dear,” were her words. A note from the Mother-Superior confirmed her declaration. Having read, I fell back in my chair and laughed crazily at the joke that was “on me.” Then I thanked God for the child. And then I wrote a check for all the money I had, went to my last victim at once, told him everything, handed my check and his hundred dollars—to spend in charity but not by way of gifts to pledgers, and fell into unconsciousness. From that hour on I have been dying in a hospital bed. My daughter has re- ceived my consent, and the young priest will send her her father’s love and last Wlessing when I am dead, in a day or so, And I shall die in peace. Yery truly yours, The ex-King of the Pledgers, H. R. R. Hertznerc. If They Told the Truth “\VOUR sermons are really wonder- ful. I don’t see how you manage, week after week, to get such a variety of stupidity into them.” “Yes, Willie, I am giving you thi spanking because it hurts you more than it does me—don’t be fooled about that!” “Yes, madam, I would be willing al- most to guarantee that if you use this hair tonic faithfully and accord- ing to the directions, at the end of another year you won't have a hair left.” HIS often happens: The scalp is neg- lected — not sham- pooed properly nor often enough—with the result that dandruff forms, the hair breaks easily, begins to fall and becomes thin. Now it is a fact that it is very much easier to prevent dandruff from gaining a foot- hold than it is to cure baldness. Shampooing, regu- larly, with Packer’s Tar Soap prevents dandruff. Its continued use will promote scalp health and increase the vital- ity and beauty of the hair; make it soft and fluffy. Send 10c for sample cake. Packer's Tar Soap “ Pure as the Pines” Write for our Manu: Hair and Scalp— and Treatment,” 36 pages of practical information, free on request. Packer's Liquid Tar Soap, a perfect cleanser, delightfully perfumed. Liberal sample 10c ACKER MFG, CO. 5-E, 81 Fulton St New York comicbooks.com