Life, 1915-05-06 · page 18 of 56
Life — May 6, 1915 — page 18: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
**"Daniels" (Left Column):** This attacks Secretary of the Navy Josephus Daniels, a real historical figure. The piece criticizes him not for his specific policy actions (which were virtuous—he cut off officers' drinks, treated enlisted men fairly, disrupted corrupt armament profiteering), but for his personality. The author claims Daniels is a "Typhoid Mary"—someone whose mere presence causes disgust in others, making people reject his reforms regardless of merit. The satire suggests Daniels is so personally off-putting that even good intentions fail because people instinctively dislike him. **"Our New Mistress and Cook Movement" (Right):** This satirizes a supposed social movement promoting better relations between wealthy mistresses (female employers) and their household cooks. The humor mocks an absurdly optimistic proposal: teaching cooks to "play fair golf" to close class gaps, getting mistresses to occasionally visit kitchens, and granting cooks "regular nights out." The cartoon below shows a woman mistaken for a bishop—likely satirizing class confusion or social pretension.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
AFTER THE WAR WHEN A YOUNG MAN ASKS PAPA FOR HIS ELDEST DAUGHTER'S HAND Daniels G.'s" Washington letter to the ening Post (April roth), ex- How Daniels Came to Be that is plaining the Goat”, contained much true, but seemed to miss the point. It said that if Josephus had been con- tent to mind his own business and let his department drift, he would have had no trouble. Instead of which he hurt the navy’s pride by shutting off the officers’ drinks, irritated the officers by coddling the enlisted men, and cut some of the lines of communication between the armament ring and gov- ernment profits. These indiscretions, says “J. P. G.”, brought down on him “the liquor interests and their exten- sive machinery of publicity” and “the whole efficient publicity power that has been used so often for the fomenting of militarism”, These suggestions make Josephus out to be the victim of his virtuous behavior. No such thing. The trouble with him lies not in anything he has done or omitted to do, but in what he is. It is not that he does not know the navy, but that. he does not understand mankind. In his relations with his fellow creatures his instincts do not guide him right, “ETRE and experience has not taught him manners, It is no use to call him names. The case is not one for a rhetorician, but for a pathologist; not for epithets, but for diagnosis. The man has a spe- cific defect. He is a kind of Typhoid Mary. As he goes about he sheds germs of disgust which attack sensi- tive people and make them sick. Another man could have gotten away with everything Daniels has done, Everything he has attempted has in it a thread of good purpose. He is no more of a teetotaler than Mr. Bryan and no more anxious than he for salvation by grape juice. But Mr. Bryan does not excite disgust, whereas people run at sight of Daniels. Talk about the power of the pub- licity machinery of the liquor and armament interests to injure Daniels is mere rattle. Nothing hurts him but Daniels; nothing ails him but Daniels. Get the Daniels out of him—the self- conceit, the impenetrable self-approval, and you will have him cured. And cured he would make a fairly good Secretary, as good, say, as John D. Long; as good, with Franklin Roose- velt to supplement him, as we need. Our New Mistress and Cook Movement (Try Our Course in Thirty Lessons.) HE new mistress and cook move- ment is now widespread every- where. It is expected to work a revolution in our social system. To bring together the two most dominzuit and powerful forces in the world, and place them on good terms with each other, is to accomplish one of those miracles which even science has de- clared hitherto impossible. Said a prominent bishop: “The mistress and cook movement meets with my hearty support. It seems almost too good to be true.” Among other features of this great movement are the following: Gradual!y getting the mistress to re- spect herself. Also insisting upon her having regular nights out. More forbearance on the part of the cook, which includes encouraging the mistress to visit the kitchen occa- sionally, always in the cook’s presence. Showing how to teach any cook to play a fair game of golf in thirty lessons. (Other features announced later.) BRANDED “YES, WE SIMPLY HAD TO DO IT; HE WAS CONSTANTLY MISTAKEN FOR THE BISHOP”