Life, 1915-04-15 · page 16 of 44
Life — April 15, 1915 — page 16: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three satirical pieces: **"Our Mr. Sharpe at Paris"**: Mocks Ambassador Sharpe, appointed by Senator Pomerene, for being invisible and unproductive in his diplomatic role. The joke relies on a pun—"Pomerene" sounds like French champagne—to suggest Sharpe is merely a political appointee without substance. **"What Will Minister Whitlock Say?"**: Critiques German occupation tactics in Belgium during WWI. Though Germans agreed not to seize Belgian food supplies, they billeted a million pigs on civilians, forcing Belgians to feed them from contributed supplies before Germany confiscates the livestock. The satire highlights this as a cruel loophole violating the spirit (if not letter) of agreements. **"The Ubiquitous Personage"**: A monologue by "Tip" (a gratuity/bribe), personified as an omnipresent figure in high society, politics, and business. He boasts of facilitating corrupt dealings among aristocrats, politicians, and Wall Street while remaining ostensibly "common." This satirizes how bribes permeate respectable society.
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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
660 Our Mr. Sharpe at Paris HAT ever became of that Ohio gentleman named Sharpe, who was appointed Ambassador to France, and is believed to have taken up that office when Mr. Herrick laid it down? He does not advertise, and nothing transpires about him. Is he engaged in acquiring the French language? Mr. urpe is credited with being the expression of the political ideas of Senator Pomerene. If that is re- called and one notices how much “ Pomerene” sounds like French champagne, one can always remember by assoc tion that Mr. Sharpe is our man at Paris. But, of course, it would be nice to know more about him than that. What Will Minister Whitlock Say ? lr is reported from Brussels (March 21st) that the Ger- mans have billeted a million pigs on the civil population of Belgium, with orders to keep them fed and cared for and report at intervals on their condition. So! Germans have agreed not to seize food supplies sent to the Belgians. But to compel the Belgians to feed a million pigs—on contributed supplies, since that is all they have— and then to take the pigs, is different! What will Whitlock say to that? The Cracksman: wito's TUE LETTER FROM, MAG? “AW, IT'S JEST A NOTE FROM MRS. STONY THE WAP’ ASKIN" ME CAN 1 CO SHOPLIFTIN’ WITH HER TO-DAY,” Caishee | Gry PooR PATTY! AND HE WALKED THREE MILES To GET IT! The Ubiquitous Personage ERMIT me to introduce myself. M Mr. Tip, if you please—or just plain Tip. name is Tip— Everybody takes me. Everybody receives me. I move in the highest circles. My presence is felt in the humblest inn and in the greatest metropolitan hotel. | travel eve where. Many people have referred to me as a “go- between”, but that is unjust. My total revenue in the course of a year is incalculable And what a life I lead. No slums for me. I am gener- ally avoided by the poor except when they come in contact with some of my wealthy associates. Then they cringe and v before me. But it would be extreme am a common person, y unfair to me to say that I I officiate at society functions in which no, money is passed, but in which my presence is none the less necessary. I negotiate dinners between ari tocrats, and, in fact, without me society would be quite impossible. I am a friend to the pol 1, to the legislator, to the diplomat, to the lawyer, and how could Wall Street or the race-track subsist without me? Will you, therefore, accept me? Thank you; I thought you would.