Life — February 11, 1915 — page 34: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

SAUT SCISSORS Disappointed (a J “Do you find that set of books you i AUT NULLus L fp , bought interesting?” Ye B&B “Not very,” confessed the man who wis Za tries to improve himself. “But I'd feel Y better about it if the man who comes What Training Will Do Sige 4 iy around to collect were as good an enter A teavlee ‘slaiciig’ a arg Cary j Yili Up eee ae ee cheba! Sir. made a bet with the manager that he y Z g would pick out all the married men among the employees. Accordingly, he 4 ; 19 Tracuer: The sentence, “My father stationed himself at the door as they f , digs wasney © da tu (he Ca tose Nae came back from dinner, and mentioned : Bie LSA Mary) what tense would Fou be apealiog all those whom he believed to be mar . , ih dt vou sald," My father hue money"? ried, and in almost every case he was Lier 1s Lreriz ‘Maav: Oh, that‘would, be right. “How do you do it?” asked the Yvon - if pretense—Tit-Bits, manager in amazement. “Oh, it’s quite simple,” said the traveler, “quite simple. . Kl The married men all wipe their fect on Soy SF “Now, Silas,” said the speaker, “I the mat; the single men don’t." —Argonaut, LY : H want you to be present when I deliver «GY - H this speech.” A tourist, traveling in the Rocky ER SO “ Yassuh.”” Mountains, was introduced to an old WSS ] “T want you to start the laughter and hunter who claims to have killed no : EW applause. Every time I take a drink of fewer than four hundred bears. \ NIN water, you applaud, and every time I " Bill,” said the introducer, “ this feller < wipe my forehead with my handkerchief, wants to hear some narrer escapes you've \\ you laugh.” had from bears.” “You better switch dem signals, boss. The old man, rubbing his eyes, looked It’s a heap mo’ liable to make me laugh the stranger over, and said: to see you standin’ up dar deliberately “Young man, if there’s been any nar- FOR THE MAN W110 OPENS WINDOWS takin’ a drink o water.” rer escapes, the bears had 'ein."—Tit-Bits, WITHOUT PERMISSION —Washington Star. Lire is published every Thursday, simultaneously in the United States, Great Britain, Lire is for sale by all newsdealers in Great Britain and may be obtained from book Canada and British Possessions. "$5.00 a year in advance. Additional postage to sellers in all the principal cities in the world. The foreign trade supplied from Lirr’s foreign countries in the Postal Union, $ pears to Canada, s2 cents. Single cur- London Office, Rolls House, Breams Buildings, London, . s, 10 cents, Back numbers, ree months from date of publication, No contribution will be ‘returned unless accompanied by stamped and addressed 5_cents. Issues prior to 1910 out of print. envelope. Lire docs not hold itself responsible for the loss or non-return of ume The tert and illustrations in Live are copsrighted. For Reprint Rights in Great d contributions, , Britain apply to Live, 114 Southampton Roi ndow, We C. Prompt notification should be sent by subscribers of any change of address. ‘Tt popular super- stition that a for- eign label makes an article any better is being ruthlessly bon:- barded during this war. Every day somebody who finds it impossible to get his pet European label is learning to his utmost surprise that American made means better made as well as less expensive. Cook’s Imperial Extra Dry Cham- pagne since 1859 has been teaching that lesson of American wine—the lesson is being triply impressed > today. Served everywhere AMERICAN WINE Co, St. Louis, U. S. A. | is rs] sellin at “Let's GIT A MOVE ON, PETE. HERE COMFS A CoP” “WOT YE SCARED OF? WE AIN’T DONE NOTHIN’ YET”