Life, 1914-09-17 · page 28 of 48
Life — September 17, 1914 — page 28: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This satirical piece mocks the hypocrisy of claiming World War I represents "civilized" progress. A Japanese correspondent describes meeting Hon. Kamo Mackenzeki, a peace advocate who paradoxically bombs orphanages from a Zeppelin while praising warfare's "scientific" humanity. The satire exposes the era's contradictions: characters argue that machine guns are more "refined" than swords, that Wagner and German culture justify brutality, and that Christian warfare is superior to "heathen" combat. They celebrate how modern artillery kills more efficiently while claiming this benefits humanity's moral development. The accompanying cartoon, "The Cup of Forgetfulness," depicts mythological figures unable to remember events—symbolizing society's convenient amnesia about war's actual horrors. The piece ridicules how Western powers rationalized industrial-scale killing during WWI using pseudo-intellectual arguments about progress, civilization, and Christian values—all transparently absurd.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
492 ‘SL TISE-E Letters of a Japanese School-boy Civilized Warfare To Editor “ Life Review” who print news about civilisation and other Jokes = EAR SIR:— Hon. Kamo Mackenzeki, cele- brated peace congressman, have just escaped back from The Hague on one Zeppelin airship, employed while doing so to drop bombs into orphan asylums, hospitals, nursuries ‘and other danger- ous Belgian positions. Hon, Kamo explan how Hon. Zeppelin are doing great work for Peace because nearly every village where he pass over are now filled with square: stones bearing Hague trade-mark “rest in Peace "— also considerable doves has been sculp- tured there. “It beat Hon. Devil,” report this Mackenzeki, who understand how to swear in American, “how civilization are advancing in Europe.” “If he advance much further,” I report like a gun, “nothing can remain except widows, ill-feeling and other landmarks.” “While residing in that Hague,” he resum, “I attempt to do everything possible for Peace. I make consider- able Bryan eloquence, but could not hear my beautiful words speaking be- cause of several cannons shooting into my window. Such speeches would do much good if they could. How- everly—"” “Howeverly?” I express with Ber- nard Pshaw eyebrows. “ Howeverly,” he say it, “since pass- ing over Europe in that explosive balloon, I am conclusive that it will be just as better for me & Hon. Car- negie to permit War to go ahead and enjoy himself. War are no longer hellish. It are like Strauss music, deliciously sickening to see and listen at, but completely scientific, there- fore valuable for human race.” “How can human race enjoy this improvement when they are entirely removed off?” I ask to know. “You are talking garbage,” snuggest this Japanese Thinker with thoughtful nose. “Anybody observing this war can see what it do for development of brains, kindness and socialism. It are such a Christian war that Japan feel ashamed to be commixt into it. If China should join this shooting match I should feel alarmed, because there would be no more heathens left and complete butchery must follow.” “Are murder by machinery more humanitarium than old-fashioned * spearjab?” is next question for me. “Undoubtlessly,” he tell. “ Vandal conquest of Rome were disgustly ex- hibition of murder by hand. German conquest of Paris are unspiring picture of what culture can accomplish for a nation in 200000000 years. Nation what produced Wagner also incubated Wilhelm, Both are musical geniuses what can show the world the beauty of bloodshad while playing on brass. See how much more pleasant it are to die for home and country than it were in dark & ignoramulous days when Tartar gentlemen walked out of China to teach their beautiful religion with axes and stinkpots! Heathens when they fight merely show hate. Chris- tians show patriotism.” “In warfare both are good ways to know,” I snuggest diplomattishly. “ Perhapsly,” he say further. “ Di- Plomacy, peace conferences, cruelty to animals, international laws, aviation, etc have been invented by Professors to add comfort to barbarism. Where armies in darker %4 of middle ages murdered enemies by pouring hottish lead down collars soldiers can now fire that lead from guns at rate of 100000000 deaths per instant. Think of how much more refined it is to have bowels tore out with Maxim gun than to get this surgery from disgustly swords like Casar done! In former generation of age war were great in- convenience to women and children, left destitute from dead parentage. But science have made that different. Think of how cheerful widow and her 34 orphans must feel while warming her hands from her burning home to know that her husband was killed from rapid fire gun by gentleman wearing telescopic goggles who came in an armored ottomobile!” “This must make suffering much (Continued on page 503.) THE CUP OF FORGETFULNESS Bacchus: 11's FUNNY WE CA: NIGHT, AND W T REMEMBER ANYTHING ABOUT LAST ONLY DRANK WATER Silenus: 11's THAT WAITRESS HEBE'S FAULT—I ORDERED “ LITHIA” AND SHE BROUGHT “ LETHE"