Life, 1914-09-10 · page 30 of 48
Life — September 10, 1914 — page 30: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page satirizes World War I's origins and imperial authority through several pieces: **"Lots of War, but Dearth of Quarrels"** mocks the claim that Germany didn't cause the war—it "just happened." The article notes that combatants don't actually quarrel with their enemies (Germans reluctant to fight Belgians, Austrians unhappy fighting Russia), exposing the absurdity of nations waging massive wars without genuine grievances. Serbia, the actual trigger, is lost in the shuffle. **"The Bride"** cartoon jokes about marrying for money—a domestic concern contrasting sharply with war. **"Captain Mollie"** depicts a female ship captain prioritizing passengers' safety, likely celebrating women's competence during wartime. **"Imperial Infallibility"** satirizes authoritarian logic: a king tortures a prisoner until he confesses guilt (lying), then declares "The King can make no mistake." This attacks imperial justice systems, particularly relevant to Austria-Hungary during WWI's origins in Serbian conflict and Austro-Hungarian aggression.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
446 Lots of War, but Dearth of Quarrels Sa result of reading the letters of Germans and German-Amer- ans to the newspapers, and espe- cially to the Evening Post, persons who thought that Germany brought on the war may be led to the view that the war was not brought on at all, but juct happened. In support of that idea it is notable that, at this writing, none of the con- testants seems to be fighting anybody they have a quarrel with. The most active proceedings are between the Germans and the Belgians. Nothing could be farther from German desire than to be fighting Belgians. So, no doubt, it is very disagreeable to Aus- trians to be fighting Russia; and as to England: “ Why,” said the Austrian Ambassador, leaving London, “why must I go away when for seventeen yeers we have been such good friends?” Between French and Germans there may be enough animosity for old times’ sake to givegwarmth to fighting, but on the whole, when was a big disturb- ance in which the proportion of quarrel was so small as compared with the forces in motion? Servia, the ostensible cause of hos- Late Vaya The Bride: JACK, DEAR, DO YOU KNOW PEOPLE AT THE HOTEL ARE SAYING YOU MARRIED ME FOR MY MONEY? Captain Mollie (to female passengers) : NOT A SOUL LEAVES THIS SHIP TILL THE You JELLY-HEARTED LUBBERS! MEN AND CHILDREN ARE ALL SAFE! tilities, is lost in the crush, * Ske is like the man with the ball in the old-time football scrimmage, far out of sight under a heap of combatants. A WORKING woman is a lady who is proud of the fact that she can take care of herself, but we have no term to indicate the ladies who are proud of the fact that they cannot take care of themselves. STAND BACK FROM THE BOATS, Imperial Infallibility ‘I AM innocent,” said the prisoner. “Hit him again,” ordered the King of the Third Degree. “T am innocent,” repeated the pris- oner, “ Give him another,” commanded the King. “T am guilty,” lied the prisoner. “Hal ’Twas ever thus. The King can make no mistake.”