Life — August 20, 1914 — page 35: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

ducing pene 30 these gar cause the id speedy re of all unsec flesh. They | entire. bod They steer cading phy DUCER, $5 BUS Water's tinon robber with ex nious- safely mpeti- 1 who Icohol tin, or bar- recog: sh the 1 to be permit The Dog: tTwere! i've CHASED THAT TRAIN INTO ITS HOLE, AN’ I DARE IT TO COME ouT! Call It Off, Becky! UST in time Miss Davis shut off news from Becky Edelson and her bogus hunger strike, so that we could give all our attention to the European crisis, It was thoughtful of Miss Davis, and we are grateful. As for Becky, she had better call at once for a plateful of victuals. All the movie machines are now pointed across the Atlantic Ocean, and the newspapers and bulletin boards are pre-empted by war news. What's the use of cutting up when nobody is looking ? “ Srrance,” said the first tramp medi- tatively, “how few of our youthful dreams ever come truc!” “Ob, I dunno,” said his companion; “LT remember when I used to dream about wearin’ long pants, and now I guess [ wear ‘em longer than any one else in the country."—Ledies’ Home Journal, How the Bell System Spends its Money Every subscriber's telephone represents an actual invest- ment averaging $153, and the gross average revenue is $41.75. The total revenue is distributed as follows: Employes—$100,000,000 Nearly half the total—$100,000,000— paid in wages to more than one hundred thousand employes engaged in giving to the public the best and the cheapest tele- phone service in the world. For Supplies—$45,000,000 Paid to merchants, supply dealers and others for materials and apparatus, and for rent, light, heat, traveling, etc. Tax Collector—$11,000,000 Taxes of more than $11,000,000 are paid to the Federal, state and local authorities. The people derive the benefit in better highways, schools and the like. Bondholders—$17,000,000 Paid in interest to thousands of men and women, savings banks, insurance com- panies and other institutions owning bonds and notes, Stockholders—$30,000,000 70,000 stockholders, about half of whom are women, receive $30,000,000. ese payments to stockholders and bondholders who have put their savings into the telephone business represent 6.05% on the investment.) Surplus—$12,000,000 This is invested in telephone plant and equipment, to furnish and keep telephone service always up to the Bell standard. AMERICAN TELEPHONE AND TELEGRAPH COMPANY not try fates ou an added charm Ly halo if there isa rVva supply of OUBIGANT pigant. Parise ronounc { refined. You titfor you § Ff , Bottle, 20¢ ents, NEW YOR lever disappoints, In Bottles and Splite, All Dealers, “The Camp Fire ans’ f One Policy AND ASSOCIATED COMPANIES One System Senator Wanted Ween Senator. Desirable position for right party. Must have knack of remembering that the State consists of a public entirely surrounded by interests. Must be young enough to know that the nineteenth century has been thrown into the discard and old enough to know that all centuries are alike in certain funda- mentals often loosely grouped under the general heads—life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Must be able to promise many things he can't perform and perform many things he hasn't promised. Must be partisan enough to secure the approval of the professional politicians and non-partisan enough to disregard their selfish wishes, Other divine attributes will also come in handy. Good appearance at public functions and the ability to say nothing at great length and in a polished manner absolutely indispensable, Address New York State, Local. Universal Service