Life, 1914-08-20 · page 29 of 40
Life — August 20, 1914 — page 29: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This 1911 *Life* magazine page satirizes economic and military absurdities of the era. **"All's Well That Ends Well"** mocks the stock market's irrelevance: closing the Exchange during a financial crisis proved society functioned fine without it, yet the government "solved" the panic by printing colorful new currency—a distraction rather than genuine reform. The satire suggests the financial system and government responses are theatrical nonsense. **"Easy War Terms"** is a glossary of cynical military euphemisms—"Neutral Territory" means occupying others' land, "Machine Gun" is labor-saving killing, and "Maritime Supremacy" goes to the "most successful murderer." This mocks the genteel language used to describe warfare's brutal reality. **"Evolution of a Cannon Ball"** shows three identical stacked spheres, implying no real "evolution" in weaponry—just repetition dressed up as progress. The opening photograph (from December 1911) depicts anxious figures during what appears to be a financial or political crisis, captioned "Those Who Make War: no, not us! Take them!"—suggesting elites avoid consequences of their decisions.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
a \\\')\\ mid Those Who Make War: xo, Not us! Take THEM! (This picture appeared originally in Lire of December 14, 1911.) All's Well That Ends Well r having been discovered that by closing up the Stock Exchange things went on about as before, the question naturally arose as to what ought to be done about it. Some were for a conservative policy and thought that the butcher, grocer, barber and clothing shops should still remain open. Others were more radical and explained, almost intel- lectually, that if these latter places were permitted to remain open it might, in the long run and, as it were, permanently, convey the undoubted impression that the Stock Exchange as a means of keeping body and soul together was not an absolute necessity. Others pointed out with fine patriotism that if the brokers remained idle too long several first-class tailors would have to suspend and thus a financial crisis would be precipitated. Fortunately, at this moment the government came to the rescue with a new currency printed in attractive colors never before used. Thus the people were amused and quieted, and, there being nothing in the baseball or moving- Picture industry to cause unrest, sober second thought came as the panacea in the right place. Easy War Terms EUTRAL TERRITORY—Convenient spots on the map to quarter your troops at the expense of the spots. Pre-pREADNOUGHT—A warship built day before yesterday. Uttimatum—Keeping the other man waiting while you complete the finishing touches. Monttizations—Wholesale death notices served in ad- vance to friends and neighbors. Macutne Gux—Labor-saving killing device. Maritime Surremacy—The prize awarded to the most successful murderer. EVOLUTION OF A CANNON BALL