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Life, 1914-05-14 · page 32 of 44

Life — May 14, 1914 — page 32: what you’re looking at

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Life — May 14, 1914 — page 32: Life, 1914-05-14

What you’re looking at

This page contains mostly **advertisements and humorous anecdotes** rather than political cartoons. The "**Our Foolish Contemporaries**" section presents three brief jokes satirizing common human foolishness: 1. **"Who's Who"**: A student mistakes Cyclops (the mythological one-eyed giant) for the encyclopedia's author—mocking educational gaps. 2. **"Financial"**: A heckler suggests splitting a crown among two sons, punning on "crown" (currency vs. monarchy)—satirizing class commentary on nobility. 3. **"A Faithful Servitor"**: A boy literally obeys instructions to "pinch" plums by pinching the entire bagful—humor based on naive literalism. These are gentle, **non-political satire** targeting human stupidity and miscommunication rather than specific public figures or events. The page is dominated by period **advertisements** (whiskey, photography, sexology books) and anecdotes from other publications, typical of Life's miscellaneous content approach.

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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Who's Who iss had just been enjoying a strenuous course in classic mythology, and as the result of the final examination the teacher expected to find some real gems of classic lore. In answer to the question, “ Who was Cyclops?" one paper read as follows: “Cyclops was the man who wrote the encycloped —IVoman's Home Companion, wnfort Without Extravagance, Hotel Woodstock, New York Financial Tt was at a theatre in Manchester. The king, aged and infiem, was blessed with two sons, He was pacing up and down the stage, with a wearied, troubled look, exclaiming aloud: “On which of these my sons shall I bestow my crown?” Iminediately came a voice from the gallery: Why not ‘arf a crown apiece, guv'nor?"—Argonaut, Portfolio Photography What woukl you not give fora picture of your son or daughter or Some one equally dear toyou? De- ferred intentions often cause regrets. Photographic likenesses in the latest art portfollo mountings insuring permanent preservation are the specialty of Francesca Bostwick. Your time and convenience not intruded upon. Appointments for studio or home sittings by correspondence. Highest references. Francesca Bostwick 19 West 31st Street, New York EGYPTIAN DEITIES Plain or Cork Tip A Faithful Servitor The teacher wanted some plums in | order to give an object lesson during school hours, and, calling one of the small boys, she gave him ten cents and dispatched him to the fruit stand down on the corner, “Before you buy the plums, Willie,” she cautioned, “ you had better pinch one or two to make sure they are ripe.” Little Willie flitted away. Soon he came back and smilingly put the bag on the teacher's desk “Oh, thank you, Willie,” said the Pure Rye Whiskey Quality always comes into its own. BOTTLED in BOND Large is, and has been for 118 years, a whiskey of quality. That is its predominant feature. Five generations have recognized this. ‘The Distillery is pronounced by experts, the most sanitary in the world. The materials, virgin rye and barley-malt, are the choicest produced. Aged in white oak cooperage, lying in massive warehouses for years, bottled in bond under supervision of U.S. Government officers, Large Whiskey is unsurpass- able as a beverage or tonic. Large may be obtained in leading Clubs, Hotels and Cafes. Ask for it. THE LARGE DISTILLING CO. Pittsburgh, Pa. A_ Happy Marriage Depends ar, st es knowledge of he Thole truth about self and rie 1 and their rel. n to and healt ‘his knowl: edge does not ci telligently of itself, nor correctly from ordinary, every-day sources. SEXOLOGY by William H. Walling, A.M., M.D. wholesome way in one vol Knowledge a Young M. Kihowteiice n Young Husbau fou Koowletgo a Father shoul 2. Medical isi thats Lpart fo ils Son Knowledce a teacher, taking up the bag. “Did you pinch one or two as I told you to do?” “Did 1?” was the gleeful response. “T pinched the whole bagful and here's your ten cents.” —Ladies’ Home Journal. A Sherbet is made tasty and delightful by using Abbott's | Rittera, | Sample (of bitters by mail, in stamps. Wr'Aabbott & Co, Baltimore, Mu Tne wife of a wealthy manufacturer has occasion to call in the help of a new you understand your business thoroughly?” “All I ask, madam, is that you shall inquire for yourself at my last situation. On the floor of the large drawing-room alone five persons broke their limbs dur- ing last winter, and a lady slipped down the grand staircase. It was I who polished the floor and the stairs.” —Tit-Bits. comicbooks.com