Life, 1914-03-05 · page 45 of 60
Life — March 5, 1914 — page 45: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This Life magazine page combines satirical poetry about Wisconsin with a grape juice advertisement. **The Satire (left side):** L.H. Robbins's poem mockingly praises Wisconsin as a near-perfect state—where education is universal, politics are corruption-free, trains are reasonably priced, marriages never fail, people don't lock doors, and even prisons are pleasant social centers. The exaggeration is clearly ironic; the final twist ("Only Jersey needs me more / Than Wisconsin") deflates the praise entirely. This appears to satirize regional boosterism and overzealous state pride common in early 20th-century America. **The Advertisement (right side):** Welch's Grape Juice positions itself as "the proper beverage" for modern, respectable men—the drink that satisfies without intoxication ("without a drug or a drag"). The ad emphasizes it won't impair judgment or "tangle the legs," appealing to Prohibition-era sensibilities when non-alcoholic beverages were marketed as sophisticated alternatives to alcohol. The juxtaposition is notable: Wisconsin boosterism paired with Welch's as a patriotic, wholesome American product.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Wisconsin O! A truly sovereign state Is. Wisconsin! All that’s good and wise and great Is Wisconsin. Every day or two I read How her laws and customs lead, Heaven must be like, indeed, To Wisconsin. Education is the rage In Wisconsin. People all are smart and sage In Wisconsin, Every newsboy that you see Has a ‘varsity degree, Every cook’s a PhD., In Wisconsin. Trusts and bosses never mix In Wisconsin. O! the lovely politics In Wisconsin! Though the railroads boost the rate High in every other state, They are famously sedate In Wisconsin. Matrimony cannot fail In Wisconsin. Babies all are strong and hale In Wisconsin. That's the state of married bliss You have read about cre this. None but gods may coo and kiss In Wisconsin. People never lock their doors In Wisconsin. No one hardly ever snores In Wisconsin. Ivy drapes each prison wall And the jails no more appall— They are social centers all In Wisconsin. O! the state of states for me Is Wisconsin! There's the place where I would be, In Wisconsin. 1 would hasten to her shore With a glad and grateful roar, Only Jersey needs me more Than Wisconsin. L. H. Robbins. “WELL, I DIDN'T THINK I'D EVER CET TO 3£_A CHAUFFEUR” The Proper Beverage On the diner, at hotels, clubs, cafes and fountains—everywhere now you'll see the type of man who knows what is good and what is good for him. ordering with his meals, or as a thirst- quencher Welch’s “Che National Drink” Welch's satisfies thirst and gratifies the inner man—it's the drink without a drug or | a drag—the beverage with neither remorse nor regret. As one friend puts it: “1's the drink that tickles the palate without tangling the legs.” It can’t interfere with | business—it is the favorite of the modern man who keeps up his “pep” and “vim.” | Nature makes it—the exact, sanitary Welch method simply secures Nature’s best AT its besi | ‘or you. The popular Welch Ball os ting atts Se ae Seere ast Other splendid Welch drinks told of in the free recipe book which we send you on request. | Get the Welch habit—it’s one that won't get you | Order a case from your dealer for home use. Your family will know cf us many delightful uses Don't disappoint yourself with “just the same grape juice.” Ask for WELCH'S—and get it. If your dealer cannot supply you with WELCH’S we will shio a vial doren pints for $3. express preoaid east of Omaha, Semple 4-02. boule, mailed 19. The Welch Grape Juice Company Westfield, New York comicbooks.com