Life — February 19, 1914 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

To Editor “ Life Press” who are dif- ferent from other newspapers, be- cause when he print inaccuracy | know how to laugh at it, EAREST SIR:— Japanese Thinking Society, of which I am a membership, met last night p.m. at Samurai Sword Hall (pronounced ' differently in Japanese) for purpose of debatting the question, After Intervention What Next?” I and several other was blameless for what happened. I was proud to be amid those Think- ers while they sat there doing so, Nearly 12 personalities was among us looking quite Congressional. Hon. Taki Ito (Progressive) begin with talking exercise. intervention have now arrived in Mexico,” he sat it. “Already Senator Penrose have arose upwards to declare that if Mexico cannot be more better governed than Pennsylvania under Penrose then nothing remains but for Powder Trust to blow it off. (Loudy “LARP*E * Letters of a Japanese School-boy After Intervention, What Next ? applause from Senator Dupont who was there, as usually, to see unfair play.) So all cannons in America is now being oiled and 7th Regiment Marine Band is practicing ‘ Annie Laurie’, War must follow after that.” Sago Fatomuto, President, make knock-knock with hammer. “You are out of order,” he say so with expression peculiar to plumbers. “Everybody realizes with brain that Intervention have already happened. Question before these Thinkers to night is What Next?” “Now that we have captured Mex- ico,” report Cousin Nogi ari and looking very Tillman, to do is to pacify its residential natives.” “This entertainment can be arranged by Dupont Powder Co and Bethlehem Steel Wor! I snuggest. “ Therefore we shall not worry.” Such shooting might take 1,000 years,” collapse Cousin Nogi. “ Mex- icans is like other species of goats— they can cat, sleep and grow children while dodging bullets.” “ Mexicans cat, sleep and grow children while dodging bullets” Senator Lodge never looked more Unitarian than when I responsed, “Folks furnishing ammunitions by contract seldom grows impatient about finishing battles.” This from me with eyeflashes. “Well, now that we have pacified Mexico our next philanthropy must be to free the peons,” corrode J. Haro, Japanese photographer, “What is a peon?” Wanda, Japanese barber. “A peon is an Aztec with a shovel. He is different from an Aztec with a sword who is called a General. A female peon is a peony.” This defini- tion arrive from me with Standard Dictionary expression. “A peon works for 9c a day and don't get it.” “Mr Chair!” holla Cousin Nogi, “I wish to move you.” “What is your emotion?” require Pres Sago Fatomuto. “T demand a committee to be ap- pointed for free those peons.” “T appoint Hon. Danl Guggenheim, Hon. Wm H. Taft, Hon. Jno D, Rocke- feller and ax-Pres Chas Mellen, These are all nice gentlemen to uplift down- troddy classes without being too sudden about it. Hashimura Togo will please write letter to them telling how to do require J. I write it with my intellectual pen. “ By intense thinking we have accom- plished considerable for Mexico.” I say while obtaining the floor. “But now there arrive one question of such disgustly importance that I am sly about mentioning it. We have took Mexico, pacified him with Du Pont powder, sent Hon. Gugg to teach them how to be free—and now what? We must supply a President for our sister- in-law republic.” “Mexico have got too much Presi- dents already,” snib Arthur Kickaha- jama, missionary boy. “ Wherever you hear shooting you know a new one is beginning to nominate himself.” “Tam standing on this floor!” I dib hashly, “and I require others to be quiet while interrupting me. Mex-