Life, 1914-02-05 · page 40 of 44
Life — February 5, 1914 — page 40: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page primarily contains **period advertisements and satirical editorial content** from an era of social reform discourse (early 20th century). The main satirical piece, "The Death of King Panic," mocks competing claims about who deserves credit for ending an economic crisis (likely the Panic of 1907). Each narrator—a New York banker, the Republican Party (referenced via "Teddy" Roosevelt), the Progressive West, international banking systems, and Wall Street—boasts of their patriotic role. The satire exposes how different power centers opportunistically claim credit for stabilizing the economy while the actual crisis resolution remains murky. The opening "Whose?" poem satirizes indifference toward urban poverty: a poor woman living in a tenement attracts sociological study, charity offers, and judgment—but only newspaper publicity generates actual financial help ($2,500). This critiques how media spectacle, rather than systematic solutions, drives public compassion. The advertisements (cigarettes, motor oil, patent services) are period-typical commercial content.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
biel | Pla Whose? was once a woman who lived in a one-room tenement with five children and a drunken husband. The police reported her. The church noted her. Stumming parties held up their hands at her. Sociologists wrote about her. Experts compiled statistics about her. Governments ignored her. Her neighbors wanted to help her. A small part of the world worried about her, The rest of the world wasn’t aware of her. The landlord bullied her. One day the agent of a charitable agency called upon her, and looking at him proudly with her back against the wall, she sai “T don’t want your help.” But a week later she was “ written up” by a newspaper reporter who knew his business, and the readers of that paper sent her two thousand five hun- dred dollars. ON GUARD— To protect your motor car against the Thief of Power—Friction. TRADE MARK REQ.U.S. PAT. OFF. GREASES Are silent, effective sentinels. For 28 years these pure oils have worked to eliminate wear. HARRIS Automobile Cylinder Oil HARRIS Trans Compound (for transmissions) HARRIS Motor Car Soap A. W. HARRIS OIL CO. 226 8, Water St, Providence, R. I. 143 No. Wabash Ave., Chleage, ML, RUSSIAN WOLFHOUNDS ‘We are the oldest breeders and exhiti- Pasetene WANTED—AN IDEA! Sus static somo simple thing to patent! Protect your Ideas, thes Write for “* Needed Inventions and ie Money.” t Atteraes Dept, may bring you wealth. fow ter BANDOL! 4 Wasblegion, B.C =BLUB PETER CIGARETTES QUALITY NEVER VARIES Made of the Finest Turkish Tobacco 50 Blue Peters packed in our patented paraffine box Order Now and You CHANGES Mild but Rich in Aroma Plain or Cork Tip Price $1.25 postpaid Condition perfect in any climate Will Order Regularly BLUE PETER CIGARETTE CO., 76 Beaver St., N. Y. The Death of King Panic Who Killed King Panic? ‘T SAID the New York banker, “I * did it with my singular patriot- ism and noble generosity, which, after the bill had passed and there was no help, enabled me to become a party to it—I killed King Panic.” “T did it,” said the G.O, P. “I, with my little Teddy. I made him do some naughty stunts and divide the party, thus enabling the stupid Demo- crats to start something, which, when gingerly endorsed by myself, put the quietus on King Panic—I was the main guy.” “I did it,” murmured the Great West, “with my sense of progressivism and my revolutionary tendencies—I was the one; I stood behind the guns— I killed King Panic.” “Tt was us,” shouted the great bank- ing systems of the world, in the dis- tance. “By the force of our noble example we made a great light, and you saw the thing that was good. We were the remote but none the less important cause—we vanquished King Panic. Then everybody rejoiced to thi that the only real patriot in the country had at last been discovered as: “I killed King Panic,” said Wall Street. “It was I that suggested the bill that put him out of business. This. has been a secret before, but now that King Panic has really taken a perma- nent back seat, there-is no harm in an- nouncing that my patriotisny was the unseen force back of it all—I croaked King Panic.” This is the Original and Genuine Morse Clarifier A remarkable tittle device mate Bt "in fade aAblning repeutocer at Makes Talking Machines Sound Life Like clear, life-like and eliminates that us fe effect, Eaully Inserted without marriog of adjust. ‘machine, Iseverlasting. $1.00 Malied Prepaid. ‘dollar’ bill, 2c stamps or check at ct GLARANTEED Ahoatetely salleertory or money refunded. ‘ony Nest tn Minneapetia fo entering tate whether 8 erate por Pentre peatyes— MORSE BROTHERS., Mfrs, and Distribut 544 Lincoln Bullding, Minneapolis, MI through rain and wind. Guard against chills and colds with a glass OldOverholtRye “Same for 100 Years” A pure, mellow whiskey endoreed five generations of physicians Lan ace ee A. OVERHOLT & CO. Pittsburgh, Pa. comichooks, conn