Life — January 8, 1914 — page 34: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A Last Appeal (M. Richepin, defending the tango, claims for it an origin in ancient Greek civilization.) Endless, Amanda, the thought I have had for you, Since the old dances went up to the shelf, Seeking for proof that the tango was bad for you. (I cannot manage the tango myself.) Yet, you insisted, to tang was but dutiful Tn you, as fashion’s professed devotee— ‘That it was not only graceful and beau- tiful, But absolutely “le dernier cri”. Now archicology rises to hinder us From such delusion; a poet points out That it was danced to the lyrics of Pindarus, id as the Alps when Salome came out. Anyone reading through Homer's old stuff is told Plainly cnough it was known before Ham, Plainly in short that the tango’s the toughest old Mutton paraded as Argentine lamb. Wherefore, | hope, my Amanda, to win you yet WW: 11 the tango’s insidious glide, Back to the waltz and the dignified minuet, y that “the latest” has Age on its side. Alec Johnston, in London Opinion. nfort Without Extravagance, Hotel Woodstock, New York. A ‘ SaTeLICS 7 Calox, with its wonderful property of giving up oxygen, destroys the I erms which give rise to decay of bs Fei theteeth. It neutralizes mouth acids, lessens formation of tartar and re- cession of the gums, removes all odors and leaves a most exquisite sense of freshness and purity. Dentists advise its use Physicians prescribe it ALL DRUGGISTS 25c. Sample and booklet free on request McKesson & Robbins New York Ath for the Calo Tooth Brush, 35 cents An Idea The stout man in the fourth row was attentively following the pastor’s sermon. “Let us, then,” said the exhorter, “break the bonds of custom and throw off the shackles of sclf, and acknowl- edge our debt to life’s fundamental les- sons, Let us deduct from the year's balance-shect those obligations which we are morally bound to assume.” At this point the stout man suddenly chuckled and slapped his leg with con- siderable force. After the sermon he was overtaken by the pastor. “You seemed greatly pleased with one section of the sermon,” he said. “Yes,” replied the stout man, “ What you said reminded me of a ripping new scheme for beating the income tax.” —Cleveland Plain Dealer. Blunt A visitor who had an exalted opinion of his golf ability was extended the courtesy of the club, and the first day he went over the beautiful course in the Highlands, accompanied by a bright caddy. He had succeeded in burying his ball in every bunker, gulley, and burn on or near the links, when he turned to the caddy and said: “Really, this is the most difficult course I have ever played on.” “Hoo dac ye ken?” asked the caddy gravely. “Ye havna played on it yet.” —Argonaut. erbet is made tasty and delightful Ri sane er eat bitters by pale ees Athos Wr Abbott & Co., Baltimo “Tnose two boys next door are quar- reling all the time.” “That's so. If you saw ‘em fighting together you'd never dream they were only half-brothers.” —Cleveland Plain Dealer, A la Mode “My wife is always complaining she has nothing to wear.” “Great Scott, fellow! What on carth is she kicking about? Get to her quick and tell her she's right in style and doesn’t know it.”—St. Louis Republic. “Grr me a cop," panted the excited stranger. “Somebody stole my coat.” “Shi!” cautioned the New Yorker, glancing fearfully about. “Do you want to lose your shirt?”"—Cornell Widow. You'll Need A Tow Line- Then you'll be ready for emer fency in town or coun! inter or tummer. Remember the time to buy a towline is when you can—not when you are in the ditch and can't, Baslioe Autowline coils up flat under a cushion. glake® ep n0 room, es bulky manila rope joes, Basline Autowline is, 35 feet of Minch famous “YELLOW STRAND® wire rope, le welahe only 434 Rounds, bat can pulls 4000, r cent, grades, Will also start a stalled wheel on its own power. Buy Avtowline from your accessory dealer, then be safe for winter driving or ° summer touring.