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Life, 1913-12-18 · page 34 of 40

Life — December 18, 1913 — page 34: what you’re looking at

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Life — December 18, 1913 — page 34: Life, 1913-12-18

What you’re looking at

This page features a lengthy humorous poem parodying Clement Clarke Moore's "A Visit from St. Nicholas" ("'Twas the Night Before Christmas"). Rather than Santa's wholesome visit, this version depicts a chaotic pre-Christmas scene in 1920s urban America. The satire targets consumer excess and social hypocrisy: shop-girls exhausted from work while wealthy women lounge in limousines; a "flying machine" (early airplane) crashing through a chimney instead of Santa descending; an angry, disheveled Santa delivering a muff labeled "The voice of the sweated in fur"—apparently critiquing the fur industry and labor exploitation. The final twist mocks religious contradiction: a terrified society woman clutches her Bible while receiving luxuries, prompting the poem's closing moral about needing faith "for the people you trap." The surrounding ads for Pyrene fire extinguishers and Martell's Brandy are period product placement. This was *Life* magazine's signature blend of social commentary wrapped in entertainment.

📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

EXTINGUISHER Yy y PAYSPART OF YOUR |.| & ay, v Y yy Fi e A ZO GL ive Points W | AUTOMOBILE}, 6M) a ve Points Worth FIRE 7 als emembering: INSURANCE PREMIUM ; Came . i Z Z That only the finest 15% Reduction in Premiums /s : Charente wine enters is now allowed if an auto- ; 7 ' MARTELL'S distilleries. mobile is equipped with a A ee a one-quart, hand fire extin- Ve ilps y bree = sage guisher, pump-type, ap- Hh ° l ‘ Serer! a tae proved by the National / See oa co. 4) Board of Fire Under- 7 THE CAVE MAN AND HIS CAVE CANEM —. te, : pare } sures its extraordinary N writers. J 2 % N Yj quality. N Vs N Yj Tha Yj F it there are tens of | ‘ The Week Before Christmas thousands of puncheons \\ YA "Twas the week before Christmas, and all developing and matur- | R ber the reducti YY, through the town ing & MARTELE'S S q' emember the reduction oxy The shop-girls and packers were fast stores, \ I is in effect NOW. De- As breaking down, r=) mand it in RENEWING /geeyy While women of leisure lay soft in their Test, Coavequcetly =| YOUR PRESEN 7 POL- =| eae: MARTELL & CO. sever | an lemand it on (pS And visi f ch: A we to bottle a Brandy aN ICY i y nd visions of purthases danced a) EVERY NEW POLICY. ea thek Lead: in until it is perfectly fit | ; gre Aetna Accident and gma] “T never go into those stores with bad ape for the mark [=| “Liability Co. and The l=) air, nee en: S| Automobile Insurance Co. P5y But the time of their closing is not my ae \ of Hartford, Conn., allow V7 affair, bell FS Tine FI this reduction. See their | Pe Said a lady who shopped in a limousine he oe toa ; an ai LA] agents. AN More roomy and lighter than t beat MARTELL'S tr = says f a er than tene- = QEvrene will instantly ex- (=) ments are. . ms Quality © frank impos- = 2 tinguish all kinds of in- i = And then as she dozed, there arose such sibility. RY cipient fires no matter how | 4 a clatter, fo inflammable the burning imme) | She rang for a maid to see what was Tee’ substance—without _injur- | ea | the matter. Sole Agents $4) ing varnished surfaces or = She saw to her horror a flying machine G. S. Nicholas & Co. upholstery. | Come down through her chimney. = Get a Pyrene Fire Ex- / 7) Tinie 0 waeiees New York 1 tinguishér and Bracket }Y Z An angry old Santa Claus, dressed like from your Automobile Vs og Bis pletire, ; | Dealer, Hardware or Gen- (=) Whose face was her Bishop's and doc- eral Store. If they can’t Jed Sore iy elaine: But always the wi supply you write to nearest ig y He threw from his tonneau a muff which . * they break Weary, ‘mist! pay! when Pyrene Branct Yj oe aca re k irl i Z Ey ie n Office. a ‘Twas labeled “The voice of the Ant we ate? augirl if-ebe makes a | PYRE MFG. CO. /p=4 sweated in fur.” : Bi < 1488 Basdeey, =) Kid mules which went tapping about the One hand on her Bible, and one on a V7 }, parquet— cheek, kr a “It’s cleven o'clock, we're delivering me wee Mstened—a ferried Z zy yet! Whil : . ? a Each purchaser wants all his parcels each vs ae one seat” nightmare piled fe c= A a ; And that horrid Saint Nicholas handed Be Picivie coast bisvarecrons: Y F ni aeue they drive us before the her more! — GORTAM ESGINEERING CO. day’s light.” wi - fas Prosctive Lee Aneelee Geattio tesa A phonograph sang with an opera voice ven or Gece at her Bible, he puted PI Vie i oops ‘, You e l (In Italian) “ ‘Tis Christmas, let all Saying, “That's what I need for th ch Ask Your Own Insurance Broker |#=4 men rejoice! Misi. ous comichooks.com