Life, 1913-12-04 · page 42 of 112
Life — December 4, 1913 — page 42: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page satirizes excessive Christmas spending through a dialogue between the narrator and "J. Walter Naraguchi," a Japanese character (indicated by broken English and the signature "Hashimura Togo"). The satire mocks the contradiction between advocating for international peace while defending frivolous holiday consumption. The cartoon depicts Naraguchi laden with Christmas purchases—dolls, gifts, and goods—while the text argues that dispersing $500 million on peace would cause political chaos (Congress infighting, corruption, labor agitation leading to riots). Yet spending that same sum piecemeal on Christmas celebration is deemed harmless. The joke targets American hypocrisy: citizens celebrate Christmas spending while criticizing military/government expenditure. The final exchange—Naraguchi refusing the narrator's donation request with only 12 cents—mocks wealthy individuals' stinginess despite their lavish personal spending. The bottom caption dismisses illustrated papers as tired propaganda, suggesting skepticism of media narratives.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
“ Holidays similar to X can make their standing down,” I deliberate. “Ah well then! If battle-war are undesirable, that 500,000,000$ could be gave to Congress for make Interna- tional Peace.” “J. Walter Naraguchi!” I holla, “you have sifficiently said too much! Nothing but bloodshad could result from 2 Peace Fund like that. In first place, Congress never gets chance to spent 500,000,000$ but what great rum- page ensues for see whether Republi- cans, Democ or Progressives should boss it. Trouble must follow. Col. Muihall would be caught in lobby bribing with some of it, Mr. Sultzer would spend some in Wall Street, In- dustrious Worker Heywood would arise up and declare by speeches that Congress was employed by Peace Trust and this oration would cause mobbed army lay mas is what makes Christians so depraved" crowd to burn down Cincinnati, de- stroying so many breweries that Ger- many must feel insulted by U. S. and Kaiserwar would be declared amidst awful slaughterhouse battle of navies and . “ “Stop up!” agonize J. Walter Nara- guchi. “If I knew that 500,000,000$ would cause so much sorrows I never should have collected it.” “Tt are never safe to mass so much moncy together in one gulp,” I con- nect. “Ave it not wiser to spent it in dig- nified quantities than to flitter it away buying dolly, tinhorn and other Santa Claus?” he ask out. “Foolishness are oftenly the wisest way of spending cash,” I annoint. “ Christmas are just like any other kind of tango; when everybody is doing so, nobody realize how insanity it is.” “Yet it absorb so much wealth!” ab- stract that undertake. It do. And it absorb it so gradual- ly it do no harm to nobody. Money and gunpowder are similar explosives: when it is blowed in small quantities by everybody it make National Cele- if shot off all to once in bulk tional Calamity. Therefore Hon, J. Walter Naraguchi stand gast for this intelligence. “And now give uply that 5$ please!" I say for hand-out expression. “You say big-high spend are Na- tional Calamity,” he dictate. “T said.” This from me. “And = smal!-down spend National Celebration.” “T say it. “All well,” renig this Naraguchi tightwadfully. “ You ask 5$ for Xmas Here are 12c.” I holla with expression tree ceremon “Why is? peculiar to one who sees penni “T do not wish to start ¢: large bang-up of money,” he narrate while walking away like a financier. Hoping you are the same Yours truly HasuiMvra Toco. (Per Wallace Irwin.) mities by Casteel rary “THESE ILLUSTRATED PAPERS MAKE ME TIRED. I NEVER WENT DOWN A CHIMNEY IN ALL MY LIFE,