Life — September 25, 1913 — page 30: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

complained the Scotch pro- “A Linguist An old but sturdy Irishman, who had ——— wade a tenbtation Gs. a eae “boss”, Canvatswe ao got a job with a railroad construction rey company at Port au Prince, Haiti cute Monies . One day when the sun was hotter than usual, his gang of Haitians began to shirk, and as the chief engineer rode up on his horse, he heard the Irishman shout: “ Alles ou sons of guns—allez Then, turning to the engineer, he said, “TI curse the day I iver learned their language."—Everybody’s. The Joke on Father She had refused him, and he was “all in “ Reconsider, Annie,” he begged. “If you don't I'll blow my brains out.” “Huh,” said Annic, “that would be a good joke on Father, for he thinks you haven't any."—Ladies’ Home Journal. Major Preatise I'm not the head of an Minor Premise: I'm not the tail of Conclusion: I must be no end of an ass—Yale Record. Ae returned untest accompanied by stamped ant addressed envelope, AVE doer mot fessor to his students; “ye dinna use your faculties of observation. Ye dinna use them. For instane-— " Picking up a jar of chemicals of vile odor he stuck one finger into it and then into his mouth. “ Taste it, gentlemen!” he commanded, as he passed the vessel from student to student. After each one had licked his finger, and had felt rebellion through his whole soul, the old professor exclaimed tri umphantly : “T tol’ ye so. Ye dinna use your faculties. For if ye had obsarved ye would ha’ scen that the fT stuck imtoo the jar was nac the into my mouth."—Ladies’ Home Journal At Home Bessie and Bertie wet a game to play. “Oh, let's play being ‘at home’ have “ON ds queried Bertie.“ What docs that mean?” “Why, don't you know?” said Bessie, wisely. “All the fashionable people have ‘days’. God's day is Sunday, and mother's is Tuesday —Harper's Magazine. a.) newslealers in xin and may te oltained trom booksellers in all the. principal ‘The torriga trade supplie! {rom T-lPics London Ufice, Casson Ilouse, Bresee, Roidhiage, The text a tows bn are ol. For Reprint Rights tn Great Britain oppty to Lave MI Suthampeon Bowe, Lowton mn am S any change of address Put a. Chau-Phone in your Limousine (Chauffeur Telephone) The Chau-Fhone is a little telephone designed for limousine and other closed bodies, and on most advanced cars has taken the place of the unsatisfactory speaking tube. It enables you to give instructions to your chauffeur in ordinary conversational tone, whereas, with the speaking tube, the noise of traffic and the inrush of air and dust made speaking difficult and understanding almost impossible. The Chau-Phone makes the luxury of the closed car complete. When you are having your car fitted for winter commission, order your body builder or repair man to install a Western: Electric Chau-Phone It can be as readily installed in old as in new cars. It con- sists of hand transmitter for the passenger, connected toa loud-speaking receiver at chauffeur’s ear (the receiver is 80 designed that it is adjustable to car with right or left drive). The wiring can be entirely concealed and the regular batteries of the car operate it. The current re- quired is negligible—none when not in use. The price is only $25 and your repair man, automobile supply dealer or garage can readily supply it. If, for any reason, you cannot secure it, we will ship direct to you, prepaid, on receipt of price. Skilled labor is not required to install it. The name “Western Electric” itself is a guaranty of the quality of this telephone, which is made by the same com- pany that makes all the Bell A terpenes Among the cars on which the Chau-Phone will be regular equipment in 1914 ocomobile, Pierce- Arrow, Peerless, Marmon, S. G. V., Premier, Pathfinder, Hayne: SEND 1 FOR‘ CIRCULAR 181-1. WESTERN ELECTRIC COMPANY “ieoe ai nnanl ie Kes evetyeneres comicbooks.com