Life, 1913-07-10 · page 32 of 44
Life — July 10, 1913 — page 32: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Life* magazine contains several satirical pieces and advertisements from the early 20th century. **Political Content:** The "Correct Biography" section references President Wilson, who had recently been nominated (likely for re-election). The joke plays on Wilson's reluctance to write an autobiography, distinguishing between "plain biographies," autobiographies, and "ought-not-to-biographies"—a veiled reference to potentially embarrassing campaign fund controversies, reinforced by the "Tabooed Subject" section below, which jokes about not discussing campaign finances. **Humor Pieces:** "Inspiration" satirizes poetic pretension through a poet attempting to describe the sea philosophically until literally knocked over by a wave, after which he can only describe it plainly. "A Manly Man" jokes about a bearded lady's resignation to her condition due to family obligations. **Advertisements:** The page includes period clothing ads (Arrow Shirts, collars) and Usher's whiskey, typical of *Life*'s commercial content. The satire reflects Progressive Era concerns about political corruption and campaign financing.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Nut SCISSORS Aut NuLLus) A Correct Biography After Wilson had been nominated one of his friends said: “ Governor, you should write an auto- biography.” There was a twinkle in Wilson's cyes as he replied : “My friend, there are three kinds of biographi Just plain biographies, autobiographics and —ought-not-to-biog- raphies. I prefer the last named.—New York World. Tabooed Subject “ Speaking of those campaign funds— “Let us not do so,” replied the man who had subscribed. “There is no use of looking last year’s band wagon in the taximeter.”"—IVashington Star. “Dax those : “Don't shoot, Abner. I think the one with the contralto voice is our Tabby.” —Washington Herald. hed every Tharstay, simuttanconsly in the United Se da, $2 : 5 Siter three’ eocbo from date of publication, rressed envelope, LAPE doer uot Madras COLLARS “Merion,” like the “Devon” with the modish cutaway front, and mate of a fine white suriped madras. 2 for 25. Canada, 20c. cach, 3 for soc. ARROW SHIRTS in every style, fit for field or function, some with Henley reversible cuffs, an exclusive feature that you will appre- ciate. $1.50 and up, CLUETT, PEABODY & CO., Inc., MAKERS, TROY, N. Y. Inspiration The bard was melancholy—he Sat on the ocean's strand. “Would that I could describe the sea,” He sighed, and waved his hand. “Would that I could describe the hue With soul and truth and skill, The way some other fellows do And did—and, darn it, will! Would that I could, in throbbing staves Describe its mystery— The sea that sleeps—the sea that raves These are the themes for me. Would that "—a wave broke over him; He, so to speak, imbibed it; It felled him fiat on the strand, It bumped his head to beat the band, It ebbed—he rose, chockful of sand, Took one look at the ocean and Described it. + —New York Times. A Manly Man “Doesn't it humiliate you to have to go through life this way?” asked the sympathetic woman as she purchased a photograph. “Yes, mam," replied the Bearded Lady. “If it wasn't for the wife and the kids I'd throw up the job to-day” —Cincinnat. Enquirer. Lave. ie for sole by all pewsdealers In Great Heltain and may be obtained from booksellers in all cities of the world. "The lorcign wade sopplied troar Lvie’s Leadon Oiice. Cannon Howse, Means Bulk Lootoa, Fat By Appointment. Usner’s EXCEPTIONAL pore STRIPE WHISKIES ‘The refined product of a firm famous throughout Six Reigns comicbooks.com