Life, 1913-06-26 · page 33 of 45
Life — June 26, 1913 — page 33: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several satirical pieces typical of *Life* magazine's humor: **Top cartoon ("Making Up the Form")**: A sarcastic commentary on women, using newspaper jargon. It mocks "degrees" (qualifications) awarded to women with insulting acronyms—"Artificially Beautiful," "Literally Brainless," "Muchly Divorced," etc. The joke reflects early-20th-century sexism, presenting women as ornamental, intellectually deficient, or morally questionable. **"Breaking It Gently"**: A brief humorous anecdote about a young man advising a friend to tell his parents he's dead before revealing his marriage against their wishes—exaggerating how badly they'll take the news. **"Heaven Forbid!"**: A satirical essay defending Japanese domestic servants against potential wartime deportation (apparently the Army and Navy Club had already replaced Japanese staff). The author argues ironically that war with Japan would be disastrous because American households desperately *need* Japanese servants, since good domestic help is scarce. It's a cynical commentary on both xenophobia and American dependence on cheap immigrant labor. The page also advertises summer rail tours and soap.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
‘LIFE: 1281 NEWSPAPER TERM “MAKING UP THE FORM” Degrees for the Fair Sex A. A—Assertively Argumentative. A. B.—Artificially Beautiful. —Mildly Affectionate. Bum Cook. B. Lit.—Literally Brainless. B.S.—Bridge Specialist C.S.B.—Cash Supplied Bountifully. D. D.—Dubious Dinners. D.L. D: Lit—D —— little doing in Literature. M. D.—Muchly Divorced. Ph, D.—Phiz of Distinction. Mus. D.—Musically Defective. Harvey Peake. Breaking It Gently A young man, an only son, married against the wishes of his parents. A short time afterwards, in telling a friend how to break the news to them, he said: “Tell them first I am dead; and then gently work up to the climax.” —Lippincott’s. Smell the real violet fragrance __ which we have caught in this crystal clear soap. Jergens Violet Glycerine ap ‘Tee moment you do you will want it. Send 2c stamp for sample cake today. Address The Andrew ‘Six months leisurely travel de Lure. Limited Westbound Sept. 11. Eastbound Oct. 16. Nov. 8.29. : bound (the Acstipodes) Oct. 2, SPECIAL SHORT TOURS Westbound Oct. 4. Jan. 10, 1914. Send for illustrated THOS. COOK & SON, 245 Broadway, New York or Boston Philadelphia Chicago Montreal Toronto San Francisco Los Angeles private tour, leave | Wovsccvee0c72;000000000000000000 Summer Tours ASSESSES GSS SSS 6SSSSSSSSESSSSRRSSRR0GESE Personal Escort Yellowstone Park and Canadian Rockies August 9 to 30 $275.00 From NEW YORK Visiting all important points in Yellowstone Park, Portland, Seattle; steamer ride on Puget Sound; Vancouver, Glacier, Laggan, and Banff, including all necessary side trips. Tour to the North August 6 to 18 $110.00 From NEW YORK Visiting Niagara Falls, Toronto, Thousand Islands, the St. Lawrence River, Montreal, Quebec, Lake Champlain, Lake George, Saratoga Springs, and the Hudson River. Great Lakes and Mackinac Island September 5 to 14 $70.00 From NEW YORK Visiting Buffalo, Niagara Falls, Erie, Cleveland, Detroit and Mackinac Island. Great Lakes and Duluth September 5 to 17 $90.00 From NEW YORK Visiting Buffalo, Niagara Falls, Mackinac Island, and Duluth. Proportionate Fares from Other Points Detailed itineraries and full information of Ticket Agents, or Jas. P. Anderson, General Passenger Agent, Broad Street Station, Philadelphia. PENNSYLVANIA RAILROAD PSPTGIIITTTGTTTTTTITIUUU DOU Erie, Cleveland, Detroit, Heaven Forbid! E respectfully call the attention of the gentlemen who would naturally share with cach other the responsibility of a war with Japan, to the fact that in case there should be such a war we might have to dispose of our Japanese help. The Army and Navy Club of New York has already taken this precaution, replacing the Japs in its employ with white help. Is this not one of the greatest arguments against having a war? Isn't it hard enough to get servants under the best of circumstances? The Japs as a rule are very efficient and economical and perform certain necessary domestic dutics with great skill. Their number has been increasing and they have gone quite far toward mitigating the servant problem. They have not been supplanting good servants—because there are not enough good servants to supplant. Let us go slow, therefore, before we render it impossible for them to do their share toward being a very present help in time of trouble Hegetesaaggededdeedaqgqqeqedqeqqeqedaqad