Life, 1913-06-05 · page 37 of 52
Life — June 5, 1913 — page 37: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three distinct elements: **Left column poetry ("A Tale in 'Blank' Verse"):** A satirical poem by Ella Bentley Arthur mocking romantic clichés and hasty marriage. The joke is in the parenthetical asides that deflate the sentiment—when a man compliments a woman's eyes as "like the stars," the aside notes "What any other idiot would murmur." The poem's payoff: the couple quickly divorces ("settled down in (The land of the free)"), suggesting marriage is prison and divorce is liberation. This reflects 1920s anxieties about changing divorce rates. **"Knew His Ground" joke:** A courtroom anecdote mocking an "expert witness" who admits knowing nothing about the facts—he's merely a professional defense witness willing to testify regardless of evidence. Social satire on courtroom hypocrisy. **Right side and bottom:** Advertisements (cosmetics, sanitary cups) and a travel promotion for New England towns, capitalizing on nostalgia for maritime history and "quaint" vacation destinations. The page is primarily satirical humor and advertising, typical of Life magazine's mixed editorial-commercial format.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
A Tale in “ Blank” Verse HEY sat beneath a starry sky One warm and fragrant June night, ‘And ’round about them far and nigh There shone the mellow: (Same old sphere and same old shine.) “Your eyes,” said he and snuggled near, “ Are like the stars above you,” ‘Then softly murmured in her ear The fateful words, (What any other idiot would murmur under the circumstances.) She neither said “ How dare you, sir!” Nor “I will be your sister.” Instead she pursed the lips of her And then, of course, he-— (Well, what would you do?) On Love's romantic primrose way They loitered not nor tarried, But hied them to a church one day And speedily were— (Life-sentenced.) No “happy ever after” fate Of them is writ—dear me, no! She quickly left the married state And settled down in—— (The land of the free.) Ella Bentley Arthur. Knew His Ground “You say this man is no chicken stealer?” inquired the judge. “Ya replied Mr. Erastus Pink- ley. “Da’s whut I said.” “What do you know about the facts in this case?” “1 isn’ s'posed to know nuffin’ "bout de facks in de case. I is an expert wit- ness foh de defense.” —Washington Star. LET USSEND YouA 'FREE, GCSES SAMPLE ns \ El Perfecto & ’ Veda Rose Rouge Women noted for lovely camplextons: + have been using Vera Rouge for | years, Tt gives to the checks the Batural roay hue of health, Guaranteed Harmless « A denefit to the skin, \ Sold by Druggtsta, Department; \, Stores: and all Dealers 1a Tollet , Articlen, Write to Dept. A Sole Agents Gro BoRGreLot & Co ))'S'ST,AT IRVING PLACE, NEW YORK DRINK FROM YOUR OWN CuP. Ratroads, Hotels Public Buildings throuzhout the ger. cas now in use. Take a package on your wining. | Sample trial package, 20 cups, for 10e. MIDWIS FIERACK CUP CO. 280 Ford Bldgs Reston More TERE: Where You Find the Quaint and the Picturesque The old towns and fishing villages of New England! You will look for- ward keenly to your summer holiday if it means a visit to some of these old places, full of the flavor of the sea and the men who followed it in the ships of long ago, in whaler and merchant- men and the famous clipper ships. These old towns, rich in romance to-day, are summer resorts to which thousands of vacationists annually repair. Situated on New England’s picturesque coastline of rocks and sand dunes, they afford a delightful change of scene. Rummage around in one of these old places, as interest- ing as an old garret, and see how much it will add to your holiday. Plymouth, Marblehead, New Bedford, Portland, Wiscasset—all of them call up memories which will contrast strangely with your own environment. Try a vacation in or near one of these old New England towns this summer. Address, Vacation Bureau, The New England Lines, Room 574, South Station, Boston, Mass. comicbooks.com