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Life, 1912-12-12 · page 41 of 48

Life — December 12, 1912 — page 41: what you’re looking at

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Life — December 12, 1912 — page 41: Life, 1912-12-12

What you’re looking at

This page mixes editorial content with advertising. The main satirical piece, "So Why Fret?" (attributed to *The American Magazine*), uses historical and religious comparisons to mock modern complaints about comfort and circumstances. It suggests people today should stop complaining because historical figures—Caesar, David, Cleopatra, soldiers at Valley Forge, and Jesus—endured far worse. The satire appears to target what the editor views as excessive entitlement among contemporary Americans. Below this, a brief joke titled "Didn't Matter" plays on religious identity: a night watchman confronts a sleepwalker in pajamas; when told the man is a somnambulist (sleepwalker), the watchman insists he can't walk the halls in nightclothes "no matter what your religion is"—the humor arising from the watchman's apparent confusion between "somnambulist" and a religious sect. The page is otherwise dominated by advertisements for novels and a White automobile limousine.

📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

that it unless dover O. J. hbor to ned the “The © arbi- “So Why Fret?” Are the trains too slow for you? Ciesar, with all of his court, never exceeded the speed limit. Are your wages too small? In Europe people are content with making a living. Are the lights too dim? David wrote his psalms by the light of a smoky torch. Are you ugly? Cleopatra, though homely, bewitched two emperors. Are you cold? The soldiers of Val- ley Forge walked barefoot on the ice and snow. Are you hungry? The children of In- dia are starving for want of a crust of bread. Are you tired? Why fret about it? Jacob was tired when he dreamed of the engels of heave Are you sick? Suppose you had lived two thousand years ago, when sickness was fatal. Are you poor? The Saviour of men was not wealthy. Cheer up! Praise God that you live in the midst of His blessings, Why fret?—The American Magazine. Didn't Matter The night watchman of a large hotel saw an apparition in white moving along the hall at two a. He hastened his “SIX GREAT NOVELS & For Christmas Gifts THE LADY AND SADA SAN vaited sequel to “The Lady of the by Frances Little, and just as rich in humor and charm. Exquisite frontispiece. $1.00 net, postage 7 cents. A ROMANCE OF BILLY-GOAT HILL The great new novel—her best—by Alice Hegan Rice, author of “Mrs. Wiggs of the Cabbage Patch.” Illustrations. $1.25 net, postage 12 cents. SMOKE BELLEW A man’s book. Jack London's splendid tale of love and adventure in the Klondike. Illustrations. $1.30 net, postage 12 cents. DADDY-LONG-LEGS Webster. A laugh on every page—orig- ‘delicious.”” Clever pictures. MRS. LANCELOT By Maurice Hewlett, A frank and fascinating chronicle of the love of three men for a beautiful roman: The author of "The Forest Lovers" at is best. | Illustrated. $1.35 net, postage 12 cents. $1.00 net, postage 7 cents. By Anne Douglas | acter study, engrossingly embedded in a fine novel." $1.30 net, postage 14 cents. At all booksellers, or the publishers THE CENTURY COMPANY The White Berline Limousine The Latest Production of the Most Progressive Motor Car Company of Amenca White Berline marks the highest development of the modern motor car, both in beauty of body design, and merit of chassis construction. Every small detail which adds to comfort, convenience, and safety of operation has been carefully and success- fully executed. The logical combination of left-side drive with right-hand control places the driver in the proper position to handle the car with the greatest amount of safety in traffic, a very important factor in closed cars. The left-side position of the steering wheel, together with the White Electrical Starting and Light- ing System, makes it possible to reach the driving seat, start, and light the car without the necessity of stepping into the street. When the services of the chauffeur are not required, the glass-partition back of the driving seat can be instantly dropped out of sight, throwing the entire interior into one compartment. White Berline Limousines are built in Forty and Sixty horse-power models. The White a] Company CLEVELAND UNION SQUARE 3 3 NEW YORK steps and tapped on the shoulder what proved to be a man “ Here, what are you doing out here?” asked the watchman. The man opened his eyes and scemed to come out of a trance. “T beg your pardon,” he said, “1 am a somnambulist.” “Well,” said the watebman, “you can't walk around these halls in the mid- dle of the night in your night shirt, no matter what your religion is.” —Ladies’ Home Journal, 2469 Why He Wanted It Arthur's mother sent him to the hard- ware store to buy a thermometer. He stated his wants to the salesman. “Did your mother say what size you were to get?” asked the salesman, “Why,” replied the boy, “just give me the biggest one you've got. You see, y bedroom with.” —Horper’s Bazar. Auimoxy is the price imposed by civil- ization on the errors it encourages. comicbooks.com