Life, 1912-12-05 · page 62 of 116
Life — December 5, 1912 — page 62: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This is a humorous editorial poem by Arthur Guiterman addressed to "Mr. Inkling" (a generic fiction writer), laying out Life magazine's editorial preferences for submitted stories. The two illustrations support the text: the top shows horseback riders in action (referencing the "punchers of cattle" and Western romance preferred), while the bottom depicts a globe with "the worm turns"—likely alluding to a story involving international intrigue or colonial adventure. Guiterman satirizes magazine editors' contradictory demands: they want stories that are simultaneously original yet conventional, exciting yet inoffensive, romantic yet not "slushy," and gripping yet accessible to ordinary readers. The poem gently mocks how editors desire crowd-pleasing commercial fiction with specific formulas (Westerns, political romance, adventure) while claiming to want genuinely fresh material. The title's pun on "craft" suggests the formulaic nature of popular magazine writing.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
2374 348) GR? Secrets of the Craft What the Editor Wants | Y dear Mr. Inkling: We want in a twinkling A story just tinkling \ ‘a With humor and zest; | Not gloomy or fearful, 1 Or morbid or tearful, But pleasant and cheerful— And one of your best. The kind that we meet with But seldom; a treat with A plot that’s replete with Heart interest, you know; Original, truly; And yet not unduly Bizarre or unruly, But quite comme il faut. ON HORSEBACK We like brisk narrations With bright conversations { And lively flirtations (That end with a ring), Or young politicians And maidens with missions Who better Conditions And that sort of thing. We're fond of the prattle Of punchers of cattle; We'll stand for the rattle Of guns, and a deal Of ranch or hacienda; Or maybe you'll send a Romance 4 la Zenda All flashing with steel. ¢ We trust that you’re shipping A tale simply ripping And virile and gripping, Yet nothing above Our Readers, nor slushy Nor mushy nor gushy, But—oh, slightly blushy, With plenty of love! Arthur Guiterman. THE WORM TURNS comicbooks.co