Life, 1912-10-24 · page 17 of 48
Life — October 24, 1912 — page 17: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page satirizes advice columns offering relationship guidance to wives. Mrs. Goomus, a former chorus girl (pony ballet dancer), reads conventional wisdom urging women to maintain their appearance and romantic appeal to prevent husbands' affection from cooling. She responds mockingly: her husband fell in love with her as a performer in pink tights, heavy stage makeup, and high kicks—yet the advice column implicitly suggests she should return to that persona while being a respectable housewife. The satire exposes the absurdity: advice columnists ignore that husbands often *married* women precisely to move away from such theatrical displays. The separate cartoon below satirizes a near-sighted elderly woman surprised by a newlywed's infidelity, shaming "Bill Simpson" for marrying only a month ago before apparently straying. Both pieces mock shallow relationship dynamics and the hypocrisy of social expectations around courtship versus marriage.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Poor Advice RS. GOOMUS, formerly Miss Mazie Gloria of the pony bal- let, sniffs disdainfully as she reads in the “ Wounded Heart” department of the newspaper : “*If your husband's love is grow? ing cold, reflect that the fault may be partly your own. Renew the memories of the courting days. When he was wooing you, you took good care always to appear most attractive to him, When he comes home in the evening greet him dressed prettily in a way that will remind him of how you looked when he fell in love with you.’ ” She sniffs once or twice more, then murmurs sardonically : “He'd fall in a fit if I greeted him dressed in pink tights and a near- diamond pin, and with half an inch of Rrease paint on my face, kicking two feet higher than my head and warbling ‘Come on in, Boys, the Water ’s Fine!"” Near-Sighted Old Lady: For SHAME, BILL SIMPSON ! MARRIED A MONTH. AND YOU ONLY comicbooks.com