Life, 1912-03-14 · page 32 of 44
Life — March 14, 1912 — page 32: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page is primarily **advertising** interspersed with light satirical poetry and humor typical of early 20th-century Life magazine. The main content includes: **"Midnight in the Pantry"** — A humorous poem about a man returning home late who sneaks to the kitchen pantry for food and drink rather than going to bed, disturbing his wife. This reflects period class anxieties: the poem celebrates the "common man's" simple pleasure (pantry snacking) as superior to fancy restaurant dining or opera—a gentle jab at pretentious upper-class entertainments. **Advertisements dominate**: Gibson's Rye Whiskey, European travel tours, Great Bear spring water, and Blue-jay Corn Plasters occupy substantial space. **"How a Chemist Ended Corns"** is an advertorial presenting the origin story of Blue-jay plasters, framed as a medical discovery rather than pure marketing. The **"Proppy! Proppy!"** section appears to be humorous reader submissions about courtship and marriage. There are **no political cartoons** on this page—it's primarily consumer advertising aimed at middle-class readers, with light domestic humor as filler content.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
THE FINEST WHISKEY’ IN THE WORLD Midnight in the Pantry You can boast your round of pleasures, praise the sound of popping corks, Where the orchestra is playing to the rattle of the forks; And your after-opera dinner you may think superbly fine, But that can’t compare, I'm certain, to the joy that’s always mine When I reach my little dwelling—source of all sincere delight— And I prowl around the pantry in the waning hours of night. have several thousand gallons of Gibson's Celebrated Rye Whiskey distilled more than VV eleven years ago, and never taken out of the wood; ripened and mellowed by the mature methods of time; smooth and delicate, with a wonderful bouquet—& Whiskey too fine to market in the ordinary way, #ltj will be drawn in one-gallon demijohns, boxed Mal xd and shipped direct from our warehouse to‘the“order of your déaler—or to personal address—at Ten/ Dollars/per‘gallén’ The GibradDstling Compaty/Philadelo, Pa. When my business (or my pleasure) has detained me until late And it's midnight say (or after) when I reach my own estate, Though I'm weary with my toiling, I don’t hustle up to bed. For the “inner man” is hungry and he’s anxious to be fed. Then I feel a thrill of glory from head down to my feet As I prowl around the pantry after something good to eat. Oft I hear a call above me: “ Goodness gracious, come to bed!” And I know that I've disturbed her by my over eager tread, GREAT BEAR 8 G WATER 50 cents per case of 6 glass stoppered bottles VEL=sitherescorted or independent —under Bartlett management, means nv arked advantages and privileges because of Bartlett prestige, a standing that our select clientele has earned for us during the past thirty years. An autractice price for the beat gervice. Write today, for Brochure F, containing $8 itine i) eraries and useful information. BARTLETT TOURS CO. 200 8, 13th St., Philadelphia, Pas How a Chemist Ended Corns Some years ago a chemist discovered a way to loosen corns. He embodied the discovery in a drop of = wax, And we invented this Blue-jay plaster to apply that wax. Since then this little ter has ended fifty million corns. You apply it in a jiffy, and the pain of the corn ends at once, Then the B & B wax gently loosens the corn. In two days the whole corn comes out. No soreness, no discomfort. You forget you have a corn, until it has gone for good. Nothing else acts like this. Think how useless it is to pare a corn, just to ease it for awhile, Think what folly it is to risk the infection which comes from a slip of the blade. This little plaster, while you work or sleep, takes out the corn completely. Try it today and see, A In the picture Is the soft B & B wax. It loosens the corn, B protects the corn, stopping the pain at once. C wraps around the toe. It is narrowed to be comfortable, D is rubber adhesive to fasten the plaster on. Blue=jay Corn Plasters At Druggists—15c and 25c per package Sample Mailed Free. Also Blue-jay Bunion Plasters Bauer & Black, Chicago and New York, Makers of Surgical Dressings, ete. «gs But I've found a glass of jelly and some bread and butter, too, And a bit of cold fried chicken, and I answer “ When I'm through!” Oh, there's no café that better serves my precious appetite Than the pantry in our kitchen when I get home late at night. You may boast your shining silver, and the linen and the flowers, And the music and the Jaughter, and the lights that hang in showers; You may have your café table with its brilliant array, But it doesn’t charm yours truly when I'm on my homeward way; For a greater joy awaits me, as I hun- ger for a bite— Just the joy of pantry prowling in the middle of the night —Detroit Free Press. “Proputty! Proputty! Proputty!”” There are those in Scotland—and elsewhere—who appreciate the value of a generous marriage portion. “Mac, I heard ye was courtin’ bonny Kate Macpherson,” said Donald to an acquaintance one morning. “Weel, Sandy, man, I was in love wi’ the bonny lass,” was Mac's reply, “ but I fund oot she had nae siller, so I said to myscl, ‘Mac, be a man? And Twas a man, and noo I pass her by wi’ silent contempt.” Youth's. Companion. Up to Date Knicker: Is their car up to date? Bocker: Well, it is paid for with nc year’s money. Suit Caron! Bitters. Addslifeand Aavortoa cocktail. \ wonderful tonicand appetizer. Ask your wine merchant, grocer oF drug! Oct. C, Blache & Co., 78 Broad St., New York, Gen'l Distr. par comicbooks.com