Life, 1912-02-08 · page 25 of 44
Life — February 8, 1912 — page 25: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page satirizes early 1900s American social conventions and economics through three pieces: **"Ballade of Total Annihilation"** mocks a society woman ruined by refusing to learn Bridge Whist (a card game). The poem's repeated refrain—"She never learned to play Bridge Whist!"—suggests that social ostracism followed her rejection of fashionable pastimes, ultimately destroying her social position. The satire targets rigid upper-class conformity: a woman's entire standing depends on mastering trivial parlor games. **The illustration** (captioned "Reflections of a Bachelor") shows a domestic scene, likely reinforcing bachelor commentary on marriage and society. **"Appreciation"** contains a brief joke contrasting American and English tourists at Mt. Vesuvius—the American's crude comparison and casual manner of travel amuse the English observer, reflecting period stereotypes about American vulgarity abroad. The page also reviews economics books by Miss Tarbell on tariffs, and includes a dark joke about an uninsured death ("McGuire is dead... he's a total loss"). Overall, the content reflects 1900s preoccupations: social conformity, gender roles, class distinction, and American character abroad.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
KEFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR legislation of the past fifty years; a comprehensive and careful accumula- tion of chronological information; a bock that deals exhaustively (and at times exhaustingly) with the what and the when, yet hints at no more funda- mental explanation of the why than the passing individual influences, per- sonal greeds and creeds and self-seck- ing interests of the politico-financial arena. Miss Tarbell’s thesis is that, in the matter of the tariff, the popular will has been defeated for two genera- tions. Her conclusion is that, judged by its results, the process has been an immoral one. But, although her book deals with economics, it is, economic- ally speaking, invertebrate. And by the same token that Mr. Simons shows us the articulated economic skeleton of an X-rayed Eagle, Miss Tarbell offers us the legislative flesh and feathers of a boned bird. J.B. Kerfoot. Appreciation MERICAN TOURIST (gazing into the crater of Mt. Vesu- vins): It looks just like the infernal regions. Enotisi Tourist: O, I say. these Americans do travel! How a not discover how shrewd he really is until he reads it in the newspaper. 309 Ballade of Total Annihilation HE is not “in it” any more. Alas! for all her vaunted pride! She has gone out; closed is the door That formerly had stood so wide. Now only laughter doth deride One who, long Fortune kissed. Society she hath defied She never learned to play Bridge Whist! since, fair O'er Elwell she refused to pore, Despite the mandate loudly eri At tables with the Silent Four She could not linger if she tried. Above Convention did she ride, Though madly friends came to insist, And now she cannot get inside— She never learned to play Bridge Whist! “Frankly,” she said, “it is a bore And neither friend nor foe replied ; Of course they thought that more nothing Was needed. Think! —the Game denied! Well, she died, For certainly she was not missed. They went on playing, side by side— She never learned to play Bridge Whist! might just as well have L'Envoi Princess, I wonder if you lied, As there you clenched your little fist, And dared announce, enormous cyed, “I never learned to play Bridge Whist!" Charles Hanson Towne is dead! Was he Pat: McGuire Jim: Dead? : No; he's a total loss! insured? THE AnOVE SUGGESTED AS A SEAL PORK THE ROCKEFELLER IN STITUTE OF PHYSICAL RESFARCHE DESIGN 1S