Life — December 14, 1911 — page 28: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

As to Queer Names The man from Punxsutawney and the man from Kokomo Discussed the Chinese troubles, and the first said, “ Don't you know, I think these Chinese names are queer enough to stop a clock. “That's right,” replied another man from fair Caucomgomoc. The man from Kokomo observed, “ By ginger! that’s a fac’. That's what my brother says—he lives down there in Hackensack.” And still another stranger said the man’s comment was true; And added with a smile of pride, “) home's in Kal’mazoo.” Another man took up the strain, * Now, down Skowhegan way And up at Ypsilanti we speak it every day. The names are all uncivilized and heathen in their ring. That's what I told my uncle yesterday in Ishpeming.” “Hohokus is my native town,” another stranger said; “And I think all these Chinese names the worst I ever read.” “Quite true,” agreed a quiet man; “they're certainly uncanny. That's what neighbors all assert in Tail Holt, Indianny. —Josh 4 in Baltimore Amer: EAT BEAR SPRING WATER ts purity has made It famous” Richest Beer It's the Pabst exclusive 8-day malt that makes Pabst BlueRibbon The Beer of Quality’ the richest, most wholesome beer, and it’s Pabst exclusive feces that gives it the delicate flavor and appetizing zest that is so pleasing. Best Dealers Egyptian Cigarette of Quality AROMATIC DELICACY MILDNESS PURITY ~ At your club or dealer's THE SURBRUG CO., Makers, New York Small Choice A certain island in the West Indies is liable to the periodical advent of carth- quakes. One year before the season of these terrestrial disturbances, Mr. X., who lived in the danger zone, sent his two si to the home of a brother in England, to secure them from the im- pending havoc Evidently the quiet of the staid Eng- lish household was disturbed by the ir ruption of the two West Ind the returning mail steamer ca: age to Mr, X., brief but emphatic— Take back your bo send me the carthqu: crybody’s. Rheumatism—Gout, Neuritis successfully treated. Crestview Sanatorium, Greenwich, Ct, He Did It : If T should kiss you, what would Sue: I should call father. He: Then, I won't do it. Sue father’s in Europe. —Lippincott's Many: A oing to ask Ida your bridge? She has been home from Europe six weeks. Atice: W yes; I'll ask her. She must have stopped telling her foreign experiences by now.—Harper’s Bazar Caront Bitters—Best Tonic and Appetizer. plete withoutit. aple on receipt of 2 Oct. C, Blac 8 Broad St. 02 A Happy Marriage Depends largely ona knoe edge of the whole tru knowledge does rot come intelligently of itself, hor correctly from ordinary every-day sources, XOLOGY Ulinstrarea ALD. imparts io a cer, e. J Impart to Her Daughter. sh Have. All In one volume. IMustrated, $2. postpaid. for “Other People's Op! od Tale of Contests Puritan Pub. Co., 776 Perry Bldg., Phila., Pa, ren. 5c pee pack Gold edge. or sent posrpald on receipt of price, Send for Catal” Of Bridge. Xcceasarten, Dept. L. RADCLIFFE, & CO., 144 Peart St, New York PRINCESS HOTEL, BERMUDA HE IDEAL W. ER RESORT. NOW OPE! Outdoor life all winter Beautify riding, olf, yachting, 8 bathing. Fi SWIMMING POOL, ‘wo days from New York by fast, luxurious steamers, ice a week, : PWOROGER, Megrs., Hamilton, Bermuda comicbooks.com