Life — May 19, 1910 — page 33: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Bel- THE ation it of T. joint. . TO \VING C.E. f the gues. $3.00 fam) | sul LUCREZIA BORGIA. the great State of Ga of Lieresla Ba, Some Old Friends Among the Jokes ADAPTED BY KATE L. ROBERTS.—PART It HEN there was the fine old Scotch joke of a Glasgow baillie who, re- plying to the toast of the “Law,” re- marked that “all our greatest law-givers are dead—Moses is dead, Solon is dead, Confucius and Justinian’ are dead— I'm nae feelin’ that vera weel mysel’ which in March, 1893, Punch republished, adapting it, however, to modern litera- ture (the speaker quaintly including George Eliot amongst our deceased “best men"). More recently a precisely parallel anecdote has been attributed to Dr. MeCosh, apropos of Leibnitz’s theory of evil (Westminster Gazette, Jonuary, 189). And again there is an old story of Baron Rothschild, who when very busy received the visit of a busi- ness acquaintance. “Take a chair,” quoth tae Baron. “ Can't," said the visitor, “I'm in a hurry.” “Then take two chairs," suggested the Baron, still engrossed. In 1871 the same joke was sent in to Punch in a remodeled form and duly published. “Call me a cab!"* says an excited gentleman. “ You're too late, sire,” replied the servant; “a cab couldn't do it." Confound you! "* cries the other, “call two cabs, then!” In this country it has long been attrib- uted to Joseph Choate. N the Echo, in March, 1895, appeared the following item of news: “ There is a curious report of a dialogue in a Chinese medical paper: Doctor: H’m. You are run down, sir, You need an ocean voyage. What is your busincss? Potient: Second mate of the Anna he Best Bitter Lig nderberg foe World's Best The best of all Bit- ters BECAUSE it refreshes instantly, and the benefit lasts. UNDERBERG is on every label. Sold Everywhere. LUYTIES BROTHERS U.S. Agents. New York. ** Building Tires on the Conscience Plan ’’ Cost TIRES EVERY AUTOMOBILIST HAS A FINGER IN THE MAK- ING OF FISK Quality TIRES and Fisk Removable Rims. From the start, commencing with the purchase of materials, continuing through each stage of manufacture, testing and inspection, the dominating question is ‘‘What will the user think and say of our product?’ With this thought, and the feeling of responsibility to those who use our tires dictating every step. we can build Only the Best. WE ARE SOLICITOUS first in the selection of machinery— it must be up-to-date and of the latest design. We are soli- citous in the purchase of raw materials—they must be of the highest grade. We are solicitous in the selection of work- men—they must be honest, expert and filled with the ever- present spirit of ‘‘What will the user think and say?’ We are solicitous in our inspection and testing departments—all of our products befcve leaving the factory must be examined with the one thought in mind—'‘What will the user think and say?” OUR SOLICITATION DOES NOT END WHEN THE TIRES ARE SOLD. We are more than ever solicitous that our products shall give satisfaction in actual work, and in order properly to realize this satisfaction we have established branches in the important cities of the United States where the wants of Fisk users are carefully, courteously and expertly provided for. These branches carry a complete stock of tires and tubes to fit all rims and maintain a modern and thoroughly equipped repair department. We Rest Easy When Our Tires Have Outlived Their Days of Useful- jness, for We Know We Have Exercised Every Precaution and Care to Make Those Days a Credit to Us and a Satisfaction to Our Cus- | tomers. Department S A_POST CARD WILL BRING NEW BOOKLETS THAT WILL INTEREST YOU THE FISK RUBBER COMPANY Chicopee Falls, Mass. Branches in Seventeen Cities Moria, just in from Hong Kong.” But more than a quarter of a century before Punch had treated his readers to the some: Doctor Cockshure (advising a nervous patient): My good sir, what you want is a thorough alteration of climate ; the only thing to cure you is a long sea voyage. Patient: That’s rather incon- venient. You see, I'm only just home from a sea voyage round the world! "" N omnibus story, printed just as it occurred, was that in which a con-* (Continued on page 938) 7 It’s a beer to know; a beer to remember. Ask for P. B. Lager and get acquainted. At leading Hotels, Restaurants and Cafes. A. G. VAN NOSTRAND Bunker Hill Breweries, - Boston, Mass.