Life — March 24, 1910 — page 30: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

S58 s — = a 2S 6000 feet above sea With evcelfent Iron Mineral Waters, Mineral Baths, Hydrotherapy The Baths have been reconstructed this year upon the newest system Terminus of the world-famous Albula Railway Routes, (2) f2 Basle Zurich - Chur - Thusis and the Albula Railwa OULES. (i) Lindau-Chur-Thusis: (c) ¢ia Landeck-Schuls-Tarasp or serjoch and Bernina by Diligence: (d) by Diligence via Chiavenna-Maloja, HOTELS: Kurhaus—Neues Stahlbad Victoria—Du Lac Lawn Tennis. Golf Links. The Guests of these Establishments are en- titled to attend all Soirees, Concerts, &c. of the 4 Hotels, Reduced Prices for Early and Late Seasons for Prospects No. 10; trom" TOWN AND New “York aad (a Englaad)"rom GOULDS & UpPER ENCADINE, SWITZERLAND. The Pity of It The blighting of love's young dream. pve, oe ont Pathetic advertisement in an Auckland Te paper:—" Wanted to sell, engagement ring (five rubies), almost new."’—New Zealand Free Lance. He Did Tommy came out of a room in which father was tacking down carpet. He was crying lustily. “Why, Tommy, what's the matter? "* asked his mother. “P-p-p-papa hit his finger with the hammer,” sobbed Tommy. BALTIMORE “Well, you needn't ery at a thing like comforted the mother. “ Why laugh?” sobbed Tommy, disconsolate. —Housekeeper. As It Is To-Day Brooncoop: How's your wife, old man? Van Dorn: The society columns re- port that she’s starting for Lenox.—Har- per’s Bacar. GREAT BEAR PRING WATER “Tts parity has made it famous” THE ‘SECRETARY OF THE TREASURY. ‘Then vp spake wise Franklia MacVeagh, o Whenever we havea sack deag! Our men Tamuse By this simple rave, Areward for Rad: Bridg SILK VELOUR PLAYING CARDS sian, colors aed price ae iervece deige techs a etacnps (leas than com) aocares car handscane axmnple wallet of eee Wi aremorien wth orw iatried alaiog. Addn Bop te Radciifte & Cou, 144 Peart 8 .. New York, and London, Put Me Among the Immortals (Mr. H. G. Wells has recent!y stated that in future the greatest scientife dis coveries will be in the direction of pre. longing human life by means of surgical operations.) Alas! that I was born too soon. Before the surgeon's knife Has learned the way to give the boon Of long-extended life! I still must be my stomach’s slave, My large intestine’s prey, Because I know no surgeon brave Who'll cut them out to-day. I care not for the aeroplane Or gyroscopic ca: For me the poles are sought in vain~ What matter where they are? The only science that appears Of value in my eyes Is that which promises more years To man before he dies. O men of science, cease, I pray, To wrestle with the air, Put charts of polar seas aw: For warmer work prepare ; Prepare the anzsthetic, grip The keen and glittering knife, And through our innards let it rip To give us longer life! Teactter: Now, boys, here's a little example in mental arithmetic. How old would a person be who was born it 1875? Pe Please, teacher, was it 9 maz or a woman?—Gentlewoman To Suit His Taste The second day drew to its close with the twelfth juryman still unconvinced. The court was impatient. “ Well, gentlemen,"’ said the court of- ficer, entering the jury room, “ shall |. as usual, order twelve dinners? “Make it,’’ said the foreman, dinners and a bale of hay."’"—A tan RYE EXCELS IN ITS PURITY, FLAVOR AND GENERAL EXCELLENCE Sold at all frst-ciass cafes and by jobbers WM. LANAHAN & SON, Baltinore, Md VVVVVVVVYVVY comicbooks.com