Life — September 9, 1909 — page 22: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

AESE A cnocotate darky and his “yaller"’ girl were walking along together + “T'se skeered mos’ to def, Rastus.”’ What am yo’ skcered ob, woman?" I’se skecred yo'se gwine to kiss me.”” How kin I kiss yo’ when I’se got a bucket on ma baid, a wash pot in one han’ an’ a turkey gobbler in de udder? “Ob, well, yo" fool, I wuz thinkin’ yo’ could set de bucket ob watah on de groun’, put de turkey down an’ turn de wash pot ovah him, den set_ me on de wash pot, ahms around me an’ des hep yo'sef."’—Everybody’'s. frow yo’ Let ig NT A HAY? !S—a Standard machine. My peat nce with three different makes of ma: chines that have been owned in three years bi brother and me convinces me that a dard none too good, Let the other fellow do the trying out. The above is an abs ceived from a Battle Cree had his “fll” of expe And his experien doubtedly the experi thousands of ¢ who have “economized"” on their first car or two. Repeated letters of this kind ma ydoubt as to whether any buyer of a so-called cheap car delieves when he buys it that he is getting the kind of a car he really wants, He may get value received for theamount invested, but unless he gets a smooth-running,easily-controlled, full-power car and one that is economic if to maintain, he is not likely to excuse the lack of these qualities on the ground that he has only a small amount invested. act from a letter just re- man who has evidently mental cars. —— ee ere ee Haynes Automobile € | 118 Matn St, i A. Please forward literature concerning your Model 19, | Same p_ Address So Haynes Automobile Company 118 Main Street Kokomo, Ind. “ Many of my opponents,"’ said Joseph Cham- berlain in one of his tariff reform speeches, “are as ignorant of my proposition as was a certain farmer, many years ago, cf the umbrella. “This farmer had made a journey of some twenty miles on feot to a small town. As he as about to set off for home again, a hard rain and his host loaned him an umbrella novelty at the time—opening it himself so as to save his friend all possible trouble. “A week later the farmer brought the um- brella back, The weather was bright and fine, but he held the contrivance open over his head. “"This instrument,’ he grumbled, ‘is more trouble than it’s worth, There wasn't a door- way in the village I could get it through, and I had to tether it all the week in a field.’ ''—Every- body’s. AR SPR WATER 6 glass stoppered bottles The Other Fellow Do The Trying- Out And it is at this point that the strong appeal of this model 19 Haynes comes to the buyer. here is a car with an internationally-known name, sel t hundreds of dollars less than is aske for any other car with similar reputation, and only little above the price asked for scores of cars éuilt mere fo sell, [PRESIDENT SUSPENDERS insure Comfort because they do not tug on the shoulders like the rigid back kind — and Style because the trousers hang perfectly, regardless of the wearer's position, Light and medium weights, Guaranteed by makers, Sold by all good dealers or by mail direct. Price 50c. In Beautiful Gift Boxes for the Holidays Exquisite designs in colors by Leon At your dealers. 50 cents, Il mail direct to any address with your presentation ard. State colors and weight desired. Write us to-day. THE C, A. EDGARTON MFG. CO. 769 Main St, + - Shirley, Mass. Taking a Mean Advantage A negro waiter in a Paducah hotel had an idea he was a prizefighter, bein tirred to deeds with of Peter Jackson and matched him with a Sw the fight ¢ off in a barn. rly in the round the Swede landed a hard one on negro’s nose, flattening that organ about six grees more than Nature did. The crack | ered the negro, and the Swede notice it. The Swede kept pounding at the negro’s nose, pounding it steadily. After he had the negro’s nose spread away and by his ears, in the third round, the negro rushed to d began tearing mad! * shouted his second no more?" * replied the negro with grea “T ain't goin’ to fight no more eman what don’t scatter his blows.’' was quic his gloves t you going wiv It affords the buyer an opportunity to economize | on the first cost of his car and also to be absolutely sure of his purchase—a com: bination that is as lacking i so-called cheap cars asitis,in another way “expen IN sive ones. e i bout a this Model 19 is in keeping with the Haynes reputation for superior construction, It has a distinctly ** ** appe: it has has made Hayneg cars famoas for th smooth-running quality and their unusual power; it has the much-talked-of Haynes clut:h; it has Zimten roller bearings throughout; it is luxuriously uphols and it has an abundance of room. Mt has everything you want or expect in an auto- mobile, And it puts within reach of every buyer the kind of car that every bi a car of established reputatio known quality Whether you buy this car or not, you owe it to yourself to investigate it. ance; automobile prefers, namely, standard car of A Haynes Car at $2,000 is certainly too good a proposition to “pass up'*if you are in the market for an automobile, Mail attached coupon for booklet giving full details of this car and important information as to wherein it is superior to other cars. Asurvitix, N. C.t The four-season resort of the South. Tue Maso English-like Tur Connecticut farmer was riding back f the cemetery with his nephew, after burying wi “Well, band, The neph she’s gone," said the bereaved assented dutifully. “She kep’ good care of me for forty year the relict he nephew said that was so. And do you know,” said the mourner ward the last I to like her.""—C politan. 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