Life — September 2, 1909 — page 26: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

LOOKING BACKWARD A Lost Love sat on the piazza together, I embered the time was beautiful She was still a splendid creature, But her complexion had been more or less burned away, and her clothes were not intended for any purpose but one, name- ly, to ward off the dust. “Do you remember,” I said softly, as 1 held her hand, “the time when you said you loved me?"’ What is love?" “Isn't it horses? '" “Yes,” I replied, “it belongs to the age when two people used to go out in a buggy, let the reins hang over the dashboard, and forget everything else.”’ “ They could hardly do that now,’” she murmured. “ But, do you know "— her face grew animated—" really it is ter- rible the way some people simply won't turn out. Yesterday we were going along at a twenty-mile clip and there was a man with a horse ahead of us who simply refused to.” “Let's get back to that other subject,”” I muttered. “I was about to tell you how much I loved you.”’ She looked at me strangely. ly she did not understand. “What is your car?’ she asked. I was obliged to admit that it was a second-hand affair, purchased from a friend. “They are very good little cars," she said condescendingly. “I had one once, until I got my four-cylinder Dart. What mixture do you use in winter?’* Mixture!'’ I repeated wonderingly. “Yes, yes. You must use something. I tried alcohol and water the first year, but it didn’t work very well. The Dart people have one that is very good. It has glycerine in it. Ob, say, by the way, I have a dandy chauffeur now. He is simply great!" “How about that love question? asked again. “It’s too much indoors to suit me,’” she replied. “ Have you ever taken the ideal tour? It’s fine. We went over it in ten days—fastest time made by a fully equipped car. We had a trunk on behind, carried no end of tires, and had three friends with us. Never had an accident. Punctures? Oh, yes, of when she she asked vaguely. something connected with Evident- course! What tire do you prefer. I've tried ‘em all, There is a new one, out last month. Splendid tread. You know 1 always try a new make of tire. They are likely to be good the first six months. We've had as much trouble with leak: valves as anything else. Oh, oh! You would have died if you had seen us the other day coming over from Philadelphia. I had an engagement to go over the Vanderbilt course, and we were due in Long Island City at 3 r. a. We hadn't got any farther than Elizabeth when one cylinder went lame. There we were, shooting along on three—no time to stop. Now, you know it takes a pretty good car to go thirty miles an hour on three cylinders and keep it up for three hours or slightly less. Oh, well, we got there! Next year I shall have a big six, I'm just dying for onc.’” “ Do you ever think of anything else,”” I ventured, “but motor cars? "* She opened her eyes. “Why should 1?’ she asked, with an injured look. I regarded her gravely. time to be considerate. “There are other things,” ated. “For example, there is falling in love, and getting married, and inter- course with your neighbors, and walking and reading and writing, and making friends and doing good to the poor, and, in fact, leading one’s life out with as much decent variety as is possible.”” I used to think of doing those sort of things,”” she but, of course, that was a long time ago. Some people practise them now, I be- lieve. This was no T assever- said reminiscently, Did you know they've opened a new hotel in Bridgeport? Makes the run down from Hartford really enjoy- able. Can you see a copper?" See a copper? How? What?”* T mean can you spot them ahead? My chauffeur is great at it. The other day, going through Hackensack—you know, they are something awful there— he almost threw me out of the back seat with the brakes; there was one of tem hiding behind a tree a mile ahead Oh, T tell you, you can’t be too careful going through Hackensack! I got up. “ Good-bye,”” hand. T said, holding out my “Remember that I once loved you, and that we never meet again “Nonsense! ’? she smiled back. “Just give me your number. I’m liable to pick you up on the road at any time. Besides, you are going on the Glidden tour aren't you? Everybody does, you know. may Chesterton Todd. Constant OTHER: Is it possible, Harry, that you have eaten all that cake without giving a thought to your sister? Harry: Oh no! I thought of her every second. I was afraid all the time that she would come before I had eaten it up. NY a minister thinks he has re- ceived a call from God when the operator has merely given him the wrong number. H, Johnnie, Johnnie,” said his aunt reproachfully, “why is ity never remember to say thank you?”’ “TL expect it’s ‘cause I don’t get things given to me often enough to practice,” answered the young diplomat hopefully, eyeing a box of candy “You May JOKES, SIR, LAUGHING AT THEM”? NOT WISIT comicbooks.com TO PURCHASE THOSE BUT YOU NEED NOT INSULT ME BY