Life — August 19, 1909 — page 20: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

LIFE Tourist Bromidioms A statistician who recently returned from a trip to British Columbia is willing to affirm that he heard people ask: low cold doe 2133 times. “What is the height of that mountain?” it get here in the winter?” 796 y do you suppose that glacier Medicine Hat where the weather comes from?" 1142 times. “How far do you suppose it is over to where t ploughing?” 1231 times. e any trout in that stream?” 4621 times. “Do the bears ever come down to the rail road?” 944 times. “ Where times. “Why is it that it doesn't get dark here until nearly ten o'clock?” 3108 times. “Has anybody ever climbed to the top of that mountain?” 2246 times. “Are these the Rockies or the Selkirks?’”” 9712 times. “Wouldn't it be great if we could have one of these mountains set down on the prairie back of Chicago?” 562 times.—Chicago Record-Her- ald. do we change time again?” 6989 Misinterpreted The boss entered the office, his face clouded, his brow wrinkled in angry thought. He called the office boy. Regarding the youth sternly, he said: johnny, do you smoke cigarettes?’ I d-d-do a I-l-little, sir,” stammered Johnny, paling beneath the tan of the baseball field. The boss fixed him with his eagle eye. “Then gimme one,” he said, “I left mine on the bureau."’—St. Paul Dispatch. HEART BEETS — Breakfast a la Mode “John, I believe the new girl has stolen the whisk broom; I left it on the dining room table lastnight.” “TL guess the joke's on me, Mary; it was not quite light when I got up this morning and I thought you had left a shredded wheat biscuit out for my breakfast."—Houston Post. s published every ‘Thursday, simultaneously in the United States, Great Brita Be ‘Additional peatage to foreign countries in Single current copies. 10 cents, British Possessions. $5.00 pear in advance. mm. $1.ob a year: to Canada, $2 cents Months from date of pabiicat: jon, 25 cents, No contribution wt does net hold itself. str sonstble for Liem is for sale by all Newsdealers in Great Britain. he returned unless accompanied by stamped and addressed envelope. ited contributions The Tnemauional News Company, Breams Shopping in Sassafras Mrs, Maude Darrell Hoffman, a pioncer of country week work, was praising in Hartford the country vacation. “A country vacation is better than a seashor one,” she said. “You see things so much quair ter. And the further into the country you gc the quainter becomes the things you sec. “I once spent August in e village call “ the Head of Sassafras, a village down in Mar land. The post office there was the general store. The morning after my arrival I wen to the general store for my mail. “A little girl preceded me with an egg in he cd. f ‘Gimme an egg’s worth of tea, please,’ | = heard her say to the postmaster-storekeepe: ‘and ma says ye might weigh out an egg’s wort! of sugar, too, for the black hen’s a-cluckin and I'll be up again in a minute.’ '’—Phil delphia Bulletin, The Originals The Hon. Theodore Hallam, one of Kentucky’s most able lawyers, was often frovoked to ex asperation by the play his friends made on his ( name. Hallam had borne allusions without en! 7 to the “Middle Ages,” “Constitutional Law and the rest of it, when one day in Washing ton he was introduced to Governor Hogg o Texas, “ Hallam? Hallani? the Governor queried >” replied Hallam. “ Arc you? "—The Wasp. Why He Led The angel was making up the list. “T never asked my fellow man if it was hot enough for him,’’ remarked Abou Ben Adhem. And, lo! his name came in under the wire first. —Sun, ncery also at Saarbach’s St Georges. Pa The text and Lave due evedit; advai Prompt notification she Pies Back numbers, after three Lire ‘agland, AGents. Brentano's, 37 Ave, de Opera. Paris Coventry Street. Leicester Square, W. London; 9, Kee jayence, German: tare copyrighted. Extracts from the text may be used £: rations are net to be reproduced without spectal perm: be sent by subscribers of any change of address. hi DELIGHTFUL “Che Dainty 14 Covered Gandy Goated Chewing Gum Particularly Desirable after Dinner BETTER—STRONGER More lasting in flavor than any other. A try—a test—Good-bye to the rest! Sold in S¢O¢ and 25¢ packets fran leer & Company Jnc. Philadelphia, USAand GorontaCan. SAFETYead ISOLATION TitH reosomy ang wee pe parent WASTE—NO tata olng svc canbe bout at stele at oo endless | oraaed wit ‘ave nucconfully employed for tariang tanks for Ube largest ral ATR-TIGHT STE LT: nine money bach ruse lis Wi fer letrated bocklet Fi THE AIR-TIGHT STEEL TANK CO. $ Wood Se, Pitisbargh Lok for the W THe first judgment that is given a letter is based on the envelope; the second on the paper upon which the letter is written. As good taste demands that the |paper of the envelope and letter be the same, we may say that the first two impressions made by a letter come from the paper. ‘i Let the impressions made by | your letters be Old Hampshire Bond impressions of quality, genuineness, reliability and solidity. You should bare the Book of Specimens, which. sbows, OLD Hasirsntnn Bown in white and fourtcen colors. made ep into Jenerbeads and other bus ness forms as actually used by prominent bouses, Write us ‘on your letterhead, Hampshire Paper Co. ‘Only paper makers in the world | making bond paper exclusively ® 6 South Hadley Falls, Massachusetts Mode “A Liale Bater Than Seems Necenary"- comicbooks.com