Life, 1909-06-03 · page 19 of 56
Life — June 3, 1909 — page 19: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
**"A Fitting Deduction"** satirizes legal proceedings. A lawyer questions a child witness about oaths and truthfulness, testing whether she understands heaven and hell. She demonstrates clear moral knowledge. The lawyer's conclusion—that she "knows a great deal more than I do"—mocks the legal profession's pretentious questioning of obvious truths. **"The Female Gadder"** is a social satire describing a wealthy, perpetually traveling woman. She's characterized as superficial: constantly moving between hotels, steamers, and galleries; collecting European sophistication without genuine depth; adaptable but restless; knowledgeable only through secondhand experience of others' accomplishments. The piece critiques idle, cosmopolitan wealth and the female tourist class—she's "never in a hurry except when she has nothing to do," satirizing both aimlessness and shallow cosmopolitanism. The accompanying cartoon "All Aboard for the Subway" appears to be a separate joke, likely about urban transportation or social types.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
MIPS AKE GOING OUT A Fitting Deduction O you know what an oath is, little girl? “Yes, sir; truth."” If you always tell the truth, where you go when you die?”? Up to heaven.” “ And, if you tell lies?” “To the naughty place, sir. “Are you sure of that?" “Quite.” “Let ber be sworn. It is quite clear she knows a great deal more than I do."* I must always tell the The Female Gadder HE Female Gadder is a lady who has plenty of money and who travels. She spends her time on railroads and steamers and in hotels. She flits from place to place with resistless energy. She knows everything—and nothing. She has European lables all over her mind. She is a cosmopolite, not an in- dividual. She had skimmed the cream from a hundred hotel lobbies. She can go through an art gallery and a railway station with equal skill. She has ab- sorbed the atmosphere of baggage rooms and bon marchés, She is stylish, chatty and unimaginative, for having seen everything, she has been shorn of vis- ions. To fall in love with her would 767 be like embracing a Cook's tour. She is never in a hurry except when she has nothing to do. She adapts herself to everybody with delightful sang-froid, but is restless in a téte-a-téte. She has “MIGHT 1 INQUIRE WHY YoU THINK f OPERATE AN AtR-SuIP?"” “WHY, WHEN YO WAS WALKIN’ ALONG DIS MORNIN’, DE BOSS SZ TO DE MISSUS, ‘MEAH COMES DE NEW SKy-PILOT.’ ”” learned not to care too much for clothes. She can make herself understood in any language but silence. She is unlocal. Her knowledge consists in having seen the things that someone else has made a study of. eka 1) cTITE CAV, Ye MONEY, . ye AZo, nFUN ‘UPON ‘ REQUEST “ALL ABOARD FOR THE suBWaY '” comicbooks.com