Life — October 29, 1908 — page 16: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

INS z: ti ee THE PACKING MAN What? Would I like to try? Yes, just to show That man can understand the art of packing. You and the maids work very hard T know; It is in method you are sadly lacking. Come, empty drawer and shelf, And I will gladly stow the things myself. Garments are folded to the smallest spzce You see I do it in a minute. tit with such a gloomy face. a dozen wrinkles in it? he worst, no doubt They can be very quickly ironed out. There, now, ‘tis d But you exaggerate, my love, cologne Is not like paraffin, It's not unpleasant. I like the smell. But there! The work is finished with two trunks to spare. I should have used them all? Your frocks are spoiled? For prejudice, confirmed and unrelenting, Give me a woman! Tah, how I have toiled! Never again shall I be found consenting To menial tasks like these— Not though you beg me on your bended knees! —London Daily Mait .1ve is published every ‘Thursday, simultaneously in the United States, Great Britain, Canada and Possessions, $5.04 year in advance. Additional postage to foreign countries in the Postal Union, $1.4 a year: to Canada, $2 cents. Single current copies, 10 ce months from date of publication, 25 cents. No contribution will be returned unless accompanied by stamped and addressed envelope. Lipa is for sale by all Newsdealers in Great Britain, ‘The laternational News Company, Breams PHILIP MORRIS | ORIGINAL LONDON CIGARETTES Are the first choice of those who insist upon | a quality smoke. CAMBRIDGE AMBASSADOR regular size after-dinner size It was bad luck T own To break that bottle, sirce it was a present. UT SCISSORS UT NULLUS UNIMPORTANT Belshazzar saw the writing on the wall, “Caused by local issues,” he said. Herewith he dismissed the matter from his mind, A gent of extraction Slavonic, When told that he needed a tonic, Growing suddenly frisky. Cried, Neverscoffwhiskit " Which in Russian is very laconic. THE PREACHER'S ADVICE “My friends," said an itinerant preacher, “the Scriptural rule for giving was one-tenth of what a man possessed. If you feel you can't afford so much, just give a sixth or a fourth, according to your means. We will dispense with the next hymn, and take up the collection.”—Lippincott’s. THE TAXI PARLEYVOO There is no more entertaining way to hour in Paris than to get into a taxic the driver to go along some street whe reasonably sure to get into a jam or to another cab. The charm of the experien enhanced by your ignorance of what th: Should your driver merely graze the other cab he will turn on his seat and luously st the other driver, who in turn back an assortment of vowels. But the best iy 4 quarrel between two cabbies obstructing cach any way. The conversation, translated as nearly ftendy as is safe, gocs in this wise: acred name! Why do you?” “Holly blue! I do not! “Stomach on the ground! You have the face ¢ an ox!" “Blue stomach! Are you in chains?" “A bast Name of a do fon Dieu! Name of a pig “Wow (or words to that effect)! Name of ; name!" “A thousand deaths! Name of a name of a nane!* Now you begin to expect some doings. Whit sex have not fully understood, you are satisfied th ing but pistols and knives will wipe out the iss. Unfortunately, about this time the jam is untay and you are allowed to drive away, but the ade driver yells after yours: “Aha! You are a little piece of brown so: It scems that this expression is the “fighting nine’ in Paris. Were it not that your cabby owes a é= to you and must convey you to your know by his facial expression that he woul! da! down and get that other cabby and muss up the & with him. He contents himself with turning about and miiy a face in the direction of his enemy and of gx) through the motion of spitting at him. Then he says “ Yoop!" to the horse and the ex is over.—Chicago Post. stination, Tuy were looking up at the latest skyserpee ut what are those things sticking out from ue sides?" asked the up-State friend. “Those? Oh, those are mile posts!" answered the New Yorker,—Judge. Tack numbers, after three No Matter TAFT chiiylars ‘andies Voted the BEST CANDIES in the World- By a discriminating Public. Building, Chancery Lane, London, also at Saarbach’s News Exchanges. ‘St, Georges. Paris; 1, Via Firenze, in ny. The text and illustrations in Live are copyrighted, and are not to be reproduced withot geod fermission obtained tn advance. Prompt notification should be sent by eubscribers of any chance of address. England, AGENTS. Brentano's, 37 Ave, de l'Opera. Pes: If sw Coventry Street, Leicester Square, W. Londoe; 9, Ra ‘Mayence, Germai Some of the people who wear American Hos- zery Underwear, We can not mention names, but— A well known statesman, The president of a great transcon- tinental railway, The vice-president of a great New York bank, The proprietor of a metropolitan newspaper, The head of one of America’s wealthiest families, One of the largest land owners in America, A director of the largest manufac- turing concern in this country, One of our greatest philanthropists. (Nine Highest Awards) woaerren UNDERWEAR For men, women and children, American Hosiery Co. 108-110 Franklin Street ‘New York Comicbooks.com